I was Dolores's age when I read Lolita, and I understood what so many grown adults couldn't: it is NOT a love story! It makes it so clear right from the start.

if anyone making a lolita adaptation doesn't frame it as a horror story, i don't wanna hear it!!

After reading Lolita, My Dark Vanessa was a whole other perspective for me since the latter was given through the abused person’s narrative. They both are important pieces of literature that everyone must read.

I read Lolita when I was still a teenager. But even then I understood that Humbert was a villain and Lolita (and her mother) were his victims. I've seen the Kubrick adaptation several times and the performances are incredible (Peter Sellers, James Mason, Shelley Winters). The 90s version never had any appeal because it was obviously presenting the story as titillating instead of tragic.

17:35 I think this highlights something else. HH describes Delores in two ways: what she actually looks like and what he sees. In the movies especially but also in these book covers choose models and actors that represent how HH sees Delores not how she is meant to look. The actors chosen (and sexualised) in the movies, especially the 1997 movie, were clearly intended to conform have conventional western beauty standards. Meanwhile HH describes Delores as heavy built with bad teeth, large feet, neglected hair, and having sallow muddy complexion. The film makers are deliberately trying to make the child "sexy" or at least conventionally attractive to the audience. They are deliberately not portraying her the way she is described in the book. I don't see how this is defendable. It believe shows that they are deliberately sexualising a child for the audience without a valid reason.

This was such a great and important video!
I loved My Dark Vanessa - a really gross, tough read but couldn’t put it down at the same time! I was fuming reading it!

I love these type of video essays,i really enjoyed it!

I haven't read Lolita but I did watch the later version of the film (a very long time ago) and it gave me the 'skin crawls', how this story could ever be seen as romantic is worrying. My Dark Vanessa was a diffucult read but a really important one. I went to school in the 90s and teacher/pupil relationships were not unheard of, I found it distressing at the time and even more so as an adult many years later.
This was such a well researched video Rae as always x

Dearest girl, I feel like a broken record as I once again tell you how happy I am to see you challenge the patriarchy, take a stand against all forms of unfair representation of women, and generally being a true feminist in 2026.  The research you do in preparation for your videos demonstrates your commitment to informed story-telling.  You are one of the good ones, Rae, and I appreciate you! 🧡

reading lolita at 13 and now at 20 feels like a whole different book.
at 13, while being at the peak of my lana obsession and being so infatuated with the idea of myself being something forbidden like dolores was portrayed as was so beautiful to me. i did not even flinch at the way humbert narrated the story, nor did i understand why people were so against others romanticizing the book (i was a child so i really did not get the severity of the story and humbert humbert’s charisma in narration did work on me lol).
at 20, reading it feels illegal, like i should hide what i’m reading from others. it makes me feel so icky now, and yet i feel oddly sad? disappointed? that i’m no longer considered forbidden. it sounds weird, but i still sometimes long to be younger so i could be considered more beautiful, more feminine, more desired. i do blame the way the patriarchy sees girlhood for this - women should act like children and children should behave like women (i.e child beauty pageants).
lolita is such an amazing book - the way it is written makes my heart throb as a writer myself. but the general public’s perception of it did ruin the message nabokov tried so hard to give.

Jill Cement's memoir Consent is also about a relationship with some serious age gap. She only realized she probably didn't have as much agency as she thought when she started the relationship with her late husband in her teens.

I’m mesmerized by your accent and also amazing video!

Yeah, the bit at the start of the video about people misinterpreting the book does not even scratch the surface of how misinterpreted the book is by the general public. If you're disgusted by the book, you're at least reading it right. The book is beautifully written and I do love that about it but it's also worth remembering that the narrater of the book is an unreliable narrater who is looking at and treating Dolores disgustingly.

Also, fun(?) fact about Lolita as a book; there is a fashion directly inspired by how Dolores dresses but it is not called "lolita", the fashion is known as "nymphet" and the reason why this fashion isn't called "lolita" is because a hyperfeminine and modest fashion subculture arose in Japan and was already called "lolita". To my understanding, lolita fashion actually got its name from the book but because this is a fashion based subculture that arose in Japan, how people looked at the book was different compared to how people looked at the book in countries like America and to my knowledge people in Japan actually looked at Dolores as an innocent character. Unfortunately, due to online censorship in more recent years surrounding "lolita" as a term despite the fashion being modest and nonsexual, people within this fashion subculture popularised the term "EGL" to refer to the fashion which itself is shorthand for "elegant gothic lolita" and was a term that was originally popularised in the 90's and 00's by a musician and fashion designer named Mana.

Also, it should go without saying not to accuse people wearing lolita fashion of pedophilia. It shouldn't have to be said but I've heard multiple stories from women on and off over the years where they get accused of being a pedophile for wearing lolita fashion because the name of the fashion somehow makes you a pedophile despite it being, you know, a fashion that is as nonsexual as a fashion style can get, actually averts the male gaze and the women wearing the fashion aren't doing it to be malicious in any way.

I haven’t read Lolita but I have My Dark Vanessa on my shelf which I now may have to head to next! Love your blend of humour and critical discussion 👏🏼📖

whenever i see someone talking about this topic i recommend watching the video "hiding in plain sight" by owl criticism here on youtube where he talks about in depth how a considerable amount of books by nabokov deal with this theme in one way or the other. i became suspicious of the official narrative ("he wrote it as an accusation and was himself disgusted") when i first came across a very explicit poem to a child "seductress" called lilith he wrote in his younger years and then read the absolutely disgusting and repulsive scenes in ada or ardor that are just one disgusting and explicit child p**n fantasy after the other, absolutely vile. i couldn't continue reading it. i searched on youtube if someone had looked into this more deeply and came across the video by owl criticism mentioned above who goes into it in detail, looking at all the books nabokov has ever written, and it's disturbing.

This is my first video of yours. I love your videos.❤❤❤

I'd be willing to assume that LDR was being satirical in her Lolita references, but I don't know for sure. They just feel too sad to be full endorsements of Lolita-as-romance

29:19 It’s a “Don’t Stand So Close to Me” Police reference. So is My Dark Vanessa, I assume is inspired by that song since Sting was an English teacher.

This was excellent!

11:30 You should watch the Kubrick version. It is a satire, hence the humor.  The book is a satire. A dark satire.