Hello! This video is gaining traction again and I'm getting a recurring criticism that the male homoeroticism section takes up too much time in a video essay about female homoeroticism. And it's true, it's about a third of the runtime, so feel free to skip to 20:38 if you really don't want to hear about the boys.
BUT, let me clarify first: the male homoeroticism section is essential to my thesis. Part of the argument in that section is that male homoeroticism is pervasive and unmediated and that Challengers is an outlier case sitting at the intersection of male and female homoeroticism.
That foundation is what lets me build the argument about what female homoeroticism is made of, why it feels different from the male version, and why rivalry between women reads as erotic. It also helps highlight the tension between intentional and unintentional homoeroticism.
Jumping straight into the female homoeroticism section without that setup wouldn't have made sense to me structurally.  You are still free to skip it tho!

I remember hearing a radio confession before from a woman in the Phillippines. She admitted that she was a very jealous type and she was so jealous of her husband's coworker. One time, she came to her husband's office and met this girl but she was stunned because the girl is so beautiful. Instead of being jealous she admitted that she was touching herself to the idea of that girl to the point that she needs to think of her while doing it with her husband. The radio broadcasters didn't know how to react to her confession they were in shock lol.

In Devil Wears Prada 2, Andy (Anne Hathaway) meets Emily (Emily Blunt) for the first time in 20 years & she says ‘Hi, hey Emily’. How are you? In a particular nervous, breathy tone.

It made me wonder that if the Emily character were male, the audience would immediately read the way Andy greeted her as if ‘Something was there’ between them

Also, the Andy character had far more chemistry with Emily than Andy had with her new male love interest

An amazing feat considering Emily and Andy are not even friends in DWP movies lol

Imo this trope should have been used on Cassie and Maddie in Euphoria.

We need a lesbian version of Jolene but from reverse (joline is actually in love with dolly but dolly thinks she just wants her man)

This feels like finding gold. This is the first videoessay that I've watched that goes into detail about the homoerotic relationship that movies like mean girls have, I feel like I was going insane for trying to explain it to people. The same way so many action movies with male leads just throw in a random woman for a romance, there's so many movies that completely center women and their experiences and friendships, and throw in a man just for romance.

I’ve always hated the idea that women just naturally compete with each other. One sentiment I grew up hearing is that women are innately catty and mean to one another, they have some sort of built in compulsion to bring each other down, my school drama was never taken seriously because “oh, that’s just how girls are!” I always felt it was misogynistic and blatantly untrue, and this video essay perfectly summarized how I feel about female rivalry. Definitely one of my favorite videos on the app, thank you for putting this into words <3

Reminds me of the thai GL "queendom", its literally about two women who are rivals(a lot of it comes from their career, family, peers and misunderstandings) who body swap and then learn eacothers lives and end up realising their rivalry was an obsession from attraction and it leads to a super cute romance about truly seeing eacother.

Barbie Fashion Fairytale has the first example I ever saw of this, between Barbie's eccentric, slightly butch fashion designer aunt, and the french goth femme villain who runs the rival fashion house across the street. As far as I remember they were "old friends" but had a "falling out" a long time ago and have been rivals ever since. 10-year-old me was like "hmmm...."

Im only a minute in, but I wanted to thank you for taking the time to add your own subtitles. I usually have them on because it helps me comprehend my media better, and the autogenerated ones can be finicky. I appreciate the thought that was put into this!

I think its just that rivalry always has a certain level of crossover with intimate tension. Its why enemies to lovers/rivals to lovers is such a popular trope, and no matter the gender of the lead character(s), they will end up shipped with their rival or enemies (if not canonically, then in fandom)

“Men aren’t the prize, they’re just a measuring stick” YES!!! Absolutely loved this video Mel, so well-structured and not a minute wasted. I can see how this became too big a project for substack, you nailed it!! I’m dying at all of the edits with the horses, I laughed every time. I also had no idea Victorian women would give each other lockets of their hair, that gives me an idea for that book I’m supposed to be writing ;) — Mary

What an incredible video essay... It has me reflecting on my own relationship with girls from my younger years as a lesbian. There was certainly some toxic competition there, but I think my obsession with my female friends and girlhood was because I knew it had an expiration date. Even in the queer world where women don't always center men, romantic relationships are still centered over platonic ones. I was in love with my friends, even though it was platonic. The romantic relationships they had caused this intense jealousy in me because it was a threat to our bonds. I knew that if my friends fell in romantic love, I'd lose that intense bond because friendships are no longer important once romance is part of a girl's life. And I turned out to be right nearly every single time.

I started bawling halfway thru the video. I'd never seen anyone explain that kind of feeling so clearly. Feeling like your female friends are your world, and then having them whisked away by men. And you're just sorta left there feeling crazy about all of it.

Bring back the intensity of Victorian female friendships !!
Plus, what a great video essay, it really made me rethink a lot of dynamics of my own life and attitutes I thought I had deconstructed but clearly hadn't thought deeply about.

9:53 my immediate thought was Joker & Batman lol--they're both OBSESSED with each other & plan their days according to what the other is doing

There‘s a song called death wish by Lyn Lapid and in it she‘s saying she hopes her best friend won‘t ever find love so their friendship won’t change and become decentered.
“I know it sounds bad, like a death wish…
But Cupid keeps killing my friendships“
And I can vivdly recall my own scenarios with a friendship diminishing when a guy came along

The point at 33:31 is so true! I had a super intense friendship (like we could hardly go a week without seeing or talking to each other) and then my best friend (at that time) got a partner- and everything about our relationship became obsolete. She didn’t need me anymore because she had a romantic partner to do everything I did and instead of pretending it’s platonic also kiss her

1:42 watching this part, knowing that dolly parton has passed away, made my heart twist. :(

"young women have to relearn how to relate to each other" totally and one of those is me. i tried to understand why i felt so restless around my peers in whole of my school life. this video essay sums up pretty much my own conclusion with great analysis and movie recommendations. thank you so much for this ❤