Just for transparency: in the part where I explained the "just world fallacy" I screenshotted a google definition and this video was made around the time when google rolled out the automatic use of AI summaries and I genuinely didn't notice until after I posted the video - before this it would use a dictionary definition which is what I believed I was doing. It wasn't intentional but I apologise for not being more thorough and I have blurred it out now. I don't like using AI and I'm really annoyed how sneaky they were with that 😭 it feels like AI is being forced on us, like when the cow edits - she struggles to know what stock images/videos are genuine or AI. It's a bit of a minefield 🤯so please know the cow & I have good intentions and the official stance on this channel is that AI is stinky xoxo

Remembering that post that says "Bullying makes no sense to me, why are YOU mad that I'M ugly"

In my opinion the actual issue here is that people are incapable of humanizing those they don’t find attractive.

I'm not poly but I am a lesbian, and something really bugged me about this dude. From what I understood his sentiment was: if you're offended you're just not one of the "good ones". And to be one of the good ones you have to never talk about your "weird and unconventional" relationship and "dress like a normal person". Like damn I wonder where I've heard that before? It was really annoying to see how many people, especially queer people, agree with him. Thank you for going so in depth with it.

the internet killed the concept of minding our own business tbh

I love how individually poly relationships failing is a proof poly relationships are doomed to fail, but mono relationships failing isn't proof of the same.

I've also found that if you're a really normie looking, acceptably feminine woman who's polyamorous then people assume that your boyfriend coerced you into opening the relationship. You can't win even if you're conventionally attractive. Because I'm a damsel in distress who has no interiority, desire, or capacity for reasonable decision-making on my own!

Crazy to me that someone will go "these people who navigate relationships in an alternative way are ALTERNATIVE LOOKING" and think they're making a point.

There’s unethical non-monogamous relationships, but let’s not conveniently forget about the many, many abusive, unethical monogamous ones. Being a monogamous vs a polyamorous relationship does not automatically make one more unethical than the other. Any kind of relationship could be unethical.

Monogamous cis & het here to report that plenty of people like me are ugly too and that's never used as an argument against heteronormativity.

The most unlikeable people from your high school when they see a tiktoker with weird hair: omg i need to say a slur

I am a poly Polynesian and you may call me Poly²

A failed poly relationship, of course. As opposed to all the regular monogamous relationships, which as we all know have a success rate of 100%.

When you read "he loves scritches" I was sure I heard "he loves scriptures." All I could think was "what a strange goat."

The guy who said “why do poly people look like that” is currently on a misogynistic crashout because his gf left him.

I think the reason that poly people, "look like that" is because a lot of polyamorous people are already comfortable with being counterculture. They don't constantly feel this immense pressure to conform thus they tend to dress and live how they want regardless of how other's judge them.

Edit: On another note, birds of a feather tend to flock together. Having "that look" can also attract like minded individuals making it easier to find each other.

That said I've met poly people that look like regular 9-5 workers too. Nothing alternative about them which is totally fine.  Just be comfortable. We are all going to die.

our cultural expectation of sex is a really big part of it, you need to have sex, but not to much, not even have sex, you are supposed to HAVE HAD sex but be "too good for it"

I’m so glad she touched on the “why do all poly people look like *that*” and how most of them are literally just visibly queer.

It’s reminding me A LOT of that “sjw cringe” content that was popular in the 2010s and how a lot of it boiled down to insulting people’s appearance.

To me, this all looks like “Average looking people discover other average looking people get more action than them and it hurts their egos.”

The dude going "Why do people in polyamory look like that" made me laugh. I personally know a lot of people who look like him and are poly. Some with the same partners.
I was also invited to join a polycule with two dudes who looked like that dude so, like, point is not clear.