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All this talk about “prodigals” reminds me of one of the most freeing aspects of leaving the faith: no longer having to see people as projects. I wasted so much time and lost so many connections from the constant need to strategize. “How do I tell them about Jesus? How do I get them to church? Are my prayers working?” It was exhausting, and I’m glad I can just meet and talk to people now.

You cannot say it loud and often enough: If you are not sure about how your family reacts to you "coming out" in ANY way, do not do it until you have a safe space you can go to.

The goat uploaded again

If I could change one thing about my life, I would have left Christianity at 18 instead of 38. I definitely regret all of the wasted years in the mental prison of religion.
Because of it, I didn’t go to college. Because of it, I had married a man that I didn’t love. Because of it, I missed out on so many friendships and opportunities just because they weren’t “of the Lord.”
Those years just went by so, so quickly 😢

If people are telling you that they're not attending church because of sexual abuse, maybe you should try to stop the sexual abuse?

Work, work, work Sky Moon.

11:47 so a perfect example of this: There's an 11th Doctor episode that involves Winston Churchill and the daleks. Just because Winston Churchill is pictured with the daleks doesn't mean that he's real.

11:32 that's like seeing graffiti that says "Harry Potter" and concluding that he was a real guy 😭

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for supporting and encouraging people like me.

Community has been a BIG part of my deconstruction. Especially since I am an ex-mormon living in Utah.

I almost moved back in with my parents and my friend told me i should come out to them before i did to make sure it wasnt miserable like the last time. The way i did it was by writing out my entire deconstruction journey in a notebook and having them read it. My only request at the end was that they didnt try to reconvert me because i was so much less stressed. My dad immediately went "well you have to tell the pastor and i have all these christian books you can read..." 🤦🏼‍♀️ the cincher for me not moving back in was them telling me i cant date anyone while i lived in their house because i also came out came out in that notebook. Im now working two jobs to be able to afford food and im still so glad im not living with them.
On the upside i have a beautiful, smart girlfriend who makes DELICIOUS food 😂

I gotta say I always appreciate your words on reminding oneself on the good--on what you've accomplished; you pep talks in general are always welcomed, it never gets old.

"It's their first time living too" is now up there with "I've never been this old before" to help remind me I'm as knowledgeable as anyone else, and they're all as clueless as me. We're all  cobbling together the best life we can.

I keep hearing that advanced theology causes atheism. It's making more sense every day.

I'm looking forward to the day when the sound of preacher speak doesn't trigger the heck outta me. Thanks for another good one.

My second job out of the Navy (the first one was only two months as an airport baggage handler; now I call them "bag kickers" because I know the truth) I was working at a Planet Fitness in Southern Louisiana. New Orleans, specifically. Very Catholic city, very Christian city. So, I don't know how me and the new kid got to talk about my non-belief, and he looks genuinely shocked that I'd say I don't believe. I guess he thought that was just something people said. I think it's important to point out that he was Black because of just how important religion is to the Black community in NOLA and its suburbs.

Anyway, he starts asking me how I was able to get about my day without looking to god and I just said, "I just do it. I roll out of bed with great effort and then put my clothes on and get on with my day."


"What do you do when you pray?"

"I don't?"

"But, then who do you talk to about your problems?!" He was getting super upset, but I still don't understand why.

"I talk to my friends and family."

His eyes just dropped from his panicked gaze into mine, as if he hadn't even considered these things as options. I ended up telling him that, while it's great to be Christian (I guess), he was legally and probably contractually obligated not to proselytized to customers or employees. He didn't stick around very long.

I have never heard anyone explain the anger perfectly!! Yes!! People look at me like I’m crazy sometimes. But truly, the feeling of betrayal is so real. I still feel like I was lied to.

I havent spoken to my parents in almost 3 years. My mother told me that i couldnt make her decide between loving me and loving jesus when i told her how much it hurt when she deadnamed and misgendered me. I know that "Jesus" is just a voice in her head, because if the jesus in the bible takes any stance on trans people, hes on our side. She decided she doesnt love me. I still love her, but since every time i talk to her she hurts me, i have cut her out of my life.

Every time i hear Todd Friel speak, i feel SO MUCH better about my own voice and mannerisms. So that’s one good thing he’s doing in the world… albeit entirely by accident.