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These parenting websites want you to know it's the children's fault

Psychology with Dr. Ana

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Intro music: Smooth and Cool by Nico Staf
Outro music: Lensko Let’s Go

Time Stamps:
0:00 Intro
1:21 Children are not born bad
7:28 Babbel!
9:41 "You are not to blame for your child's behavior"
20:34 Who is behind Empowering Parents?
22:31 The Parent Cue

Reference:
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles...

20 Comments

@AnaPsychology Creator 1 year ago Pinned

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@sabrinagranger5468 1 year ago

"Nobody wants to take accountability these days. Here's why that's not your fault." Brilliant.

@amyjudy33 1 year ago

The outrageous irony of the line "From politicians to celebrities to our kids, no one seems able to admit they were wrong or take responsibility these days." in an article titled "Parenting Truth: You Are Not To Blame for Your Child's Behavior"... It is so astoundingly hypocritical and narcissistic.

@louise6268 1 year ago

"Here's why it's ALL nature, never nurture!"

Can't wait for the follow up article "Is your child successful and happy? Don't congratulate yourself, you had nothing to do with it!"

@Mockingdragon 1 year ago

"Backtalk" is such a huge red flag for me. I used to get yelled at for "back talking" when I tried to ask clarifying questions about the instructions/orders I was given. If I didn't understand and I tried to confirm, or if I tried to offer additional information my mom didn't have, that was "back talk". I guess there may be some expression of this that is a bad thing that needs to be squashed, but I've never seen it.

@Raven17729 1 year ago

My parents LOVED to tell me constantly that I had ODD. Until I started reading out the causes to them and mentioned that abusive/bad parenting is usually the cause of ODD, then they suddenly changed the topic.

@transplantman 1 year ago (edited)

It’s interesting to me that these parents want total control over their kids’ actions but also demand that their kids develop enough sense of autonomy and control over their actions to be responsible for those actions. So…which is it?

@aeh323 1 year ago

My autistic son had horrific behaviour issues. The solution was learning to understand him. He had a hearing problem and severe sensory difficulties and we needed to find ways to keep him calm and communicate with him.

@tally551 1 year ago

My parents thought i was faking stomach aches because i was being bullied at school. They repeated this to me as an adult and i just looked at them in shock. Did it not even occur to them, the bullying caused the stomach aches? Nope i must be lying and manipulating them.

@mosheontoast 1 year ago

Right off the bat the "you are not to blame for your child's behaviour" is absolutely wild

@spencersnyder7042 1 year ago

I work with “troubled teens” and it is shocking how many parents just refuse to accept responsibility for anything. My question for these kinda of people is always: okay, if it’s not your fault, then whose is it? Because I’m pretty sure you were the one tasked with teaching this tiny human about the world. Sure, there are some things you don’t have total control over, but I really don’t think there is any one factor that affects what kind of person you are more than what your relationship with your parents is like.

@orendungan3455 1 year ago

'The way they're packaged' is a very nice way of calling out a dogwhistle. These all sound like the gateway to the estranged parents group pipeline.

@reki088 1 year ago

6:50 "My kid won't get out of bed" it's funny because a kid waking up tired is a clear symptom of something going on in his physiology. Either sleep deprivation, poor sleep quality, or a sluggish metabolism, either of those can be caused by some nutrient deficiencies (eg. Vitamin B1, magnesium, etc)

@intrepidabsurdist 1 year ago

I don’t get how kids can be blamed for much of anything. They have no control of their genetics and they have not been on the earth long enough to make reasonable decisions without parental guidance.

@PunishedFelix 1 year ago (edited)

Ah so this is where my mother who literally starved us intentionally got the idea of "The Cult of the Child" from. Been mourning my twin sister who unlived herself 9 years ago. My mother pushed her to her limit. Of course it was always "she was just born wrong". The worst part is everyone in my family insists she was just "mentally ill" and so absolving themselves of any responsibility - so even after their behavior LITERALLY accumulates a body count they STILL won't take responsibility.

I can't believe people say this kind of crap after clearly literally abusing a baby for being a little fussier than the other one. I basically survived because I cried less and that haunts me

@G195s 1 year ago

I was looking up Oppostional defiance disorder the other day. Ended up on youtube and was reading the comments from all the parents that are like "I tried everything but nothing works"

And I remembered why I developed oppositional defiance. Because all my parents did was boss me around and punish me if I didn't listen. Put two and two together folks. There aren't problem children, there is bad parenting.

@amytaylor2739 1 year ago

Ha ha “culture of blame” yes but who is modeling this? Ironic that the adult is actually blaming the child while also trying to blame the culture. Drives me crazy that they don’t see this.

@matthewdancz9152 1 year ago

Disrespectful children are completely the fault of the parents, and also their responsibility.

@bathbomber 1 year ago (edited)

We approached a child health nurse because our daughter wasn't listening to us. She wasn't being defiant, sometimes she just wouldn't register that we had called out her name and seemed to be off in her own little world.
The therapist told us to do a parenting course. Her automatic assumption was that we were struggling as parents, and didn't listen to what we were actually saying about our daughter.
In most other ways, our daughter was very advanced for her age.

Turns out she has autism, and not responding to her name was an early sign.

We did need to do a course, but general parenting skills wasn't the right one.

@Heroltz998 1 year ago

I do be getting immediately suspicious when people want to relieve the party with more power in the relationship of responsibility, and place the "blame" on the one with less power.