5:28 Screw the lighting, where’s the popcorn?

STOP SAYING ROGUES NEED AN ALLY FOR SNEAK ATTACK.
They don't need an ally beside their enemy, they need an ENEMY of the enemy beside them!

My mother is playing a druid in my campaign. Her character has a twin who’s also a druid, and whenever one of them wildshapes, the other one also wildshapes into the same animal!

8:17 he literally inceptioned him

I have a new dnd character that I’m using for my friend/dm’s new campaign in 2 days and they’re a kenku, so that mean they are a crow and can only say things they’ve heard before . my dm had a player who was a kenku and basically only said, “I’m Batman.” and whenever she’d ask him his name, he’d say “nightmare”/“i live in your nightmares” and so they called him that. his name was bob . so my character could say the most random shit ever like, the other characters are having an in-depth conversation about something serious and out of nowhere they just go, ”ass.” and then go back to saying nothing for the next 4 hours.

7:42




We're Paladin mains.  Our character's family is alive and well.  But if we wanna add some flavor, our character is an orphan

We're Paladin mains.  Of course we're gonna smite every time we successfully make a melee attack

We're Paladin mains.  Of course we're wearing heavy armor at all times.  Here, have a shield

We're Paladin mains.  Of course we're the designated frontline wall

We're Paladin mains.  Of course we took any other background except the criminal

We're Paladin mains.  Of course we're gonna ask the DM if killing that loathsome Rogue in our party violates out oath


DM: sigh Roll for persuasion

Welcome back, Rumi.

Rumi is responsible for my Legends of Avantris addiction.

5:24 sometimes the trauma writes itself

5:51 the halfling one I sort of understand but the others are just signs of a bad player

Zamonark has Returned

1:56 summarizes my group so well

1:26 as someone who has recently gotten into doctor who this was terrifying to think of

2:12 yeah that was one of my latest sessions. Lol

The goal was to just get this magic staff a sahuagin priestess had, hand it off to the monk to take off with, and the rest of us hold back and kill the rest to insure she could escape (the monk). This was important because we needed to stop the priestess from completing the ritual and a town had sent us on a mission to acquire the magic staff the priestess was using. So yeah, we snuck closer and got pretty dang close, even having our allies distract a good number of minions away. However, the moment we were spotted all heck broke loose. My cleric used silence to disrupt the ritual and draw the priestess away from the site, where the two started flinging spells at each other one on one. Our fighter tanked a whole hoard of little minions (the rest backed him up but they were long range) while our wizard went and started absorbing the magic of the ritual, which he gained control over (because I lured the priestess away). By the end, all the minions are dead, the summoning magic of the ritual for the shark god was devoured by our wizard (he absorbed the magic) and the priestess was asleep (blood cleric). My cleric nearly died but the paladin luckily got me up before I failed the final save. This entire thing also led to us being invited to join the ship captain’s crew which meant being invited to be a pirate. We did get the rod though but our wizard now has a voracious appetite and very sharp teeth lol. Oh but he did give that up technically to save us from an evil pirate crew catching up which got driven off by a prayer by our fighter to the storm god and, when that was being countered by their magic, the wizard gave up his boons to disrupt that and so we got away. We had a lively time of it. Oh but we also had a body we had to get rid of from a corrupt pirate hunter captain which, if it was ever discovered we had been around when he was killed, that we would have some major enemies with criminal backgrounds. Fun! But we did finish the job and even brought the priestess back to stand trial. So bonus!

Oh and 5:43 this is often my dm for my roleplaying and storytelling heavy campaign. Lol yeah he mostly just has to sit back and let us hand over plot hooks to him rather than give us them. It’s pretty funny. He definitely makes sure the backstory stuff is very well integrated though.

That one about the dm making original characters because the player had read the monster manual, yeah I did that, I made my dm have to come up with new things so I didn't know the best way to beat them.

That POV of the player that memorized the phb pisses me off a LOT for personal reasons. TL;DR: Back in like my second ever DnD campaign I played a half drow half high elf Paladin who for a good chunk of the campaign kept her identity a secret from the party by wearing armor, and not speaking. Everything was going great....until the inevitable reveal. When it was revealed what I was, our fighter, let's call them...Jade, flipped her freaking lid. Saying my character shouldn't exist cause Drow are evil and that I should "Burn my character sheet and start over."...yeah both me, pretty much all the group aside from Jade, and and the teacher took a vote, and we not only kicked Jade out, but burnt her character sheet.

9:18 i love this crew

2:52 Wait, I just thought of something better.

clears throat

"I'm the decapitated head of the last rules lawyer that dared to challenge the DM on his ruling, and he now keeps me in a desk drawer to put on random glasses that magically projects words."

Addenium: 5:50 And here's the last known footage of said rules lawyer.

We're fighter mains, yeah we might not be able to hit as hard as you but at least we don't go down like your mom at 2am at the bar just because a someone shook our hand a bit too hard.

5:50 and that how you get uninvited from D&D

Snooty B at 6:30 either have fun like the rest of us, or get out