Back with another chart video for you! We're going over the root of self-sabotage and how to eliminate it for good. SMASH that like button if you dig it. Here's the free newsletter + shadow work Qs mentioned: https://www.clarkkegley.com/shadow-work

Timestamps

00:00 You vs. You
00:59 The Reason You Do This
02:13 The 4-Step Cycle
08:04 Fix 1
09:24 Fix 2
11:40 Fix 3
14:26 Fix 4
16:06 Do This Next

I feel like none of us searched for this video but we are all the exact same type of people

the trigger > escape > relief > shame loop is way too real. crazy how the shame from sabotaging literally becomes the next trigger for doing it again

Diet coke for cleaning a bicycle chain and coke zero for cleaning the loo.

Every time there’s something I want to do, I get so motivated, I have so many ideas, I know exactly how to do it, but as soon as I start my brain shuts down and I end up clueless with even the smallest things

This guy starts describing how the escape is “let me just consume more how to content”… so this is literally me escaping

I love the fact you are using a paper and drawing on it in a time when AI existed thank you dude.

4 minutes in and i have never felt so called out in my life, hit the nail on the head with me

That whole, "if I didn't really try (or care), then you can't say I failed", that hit hard.

I was a top 0.1% Warcraft player and retired years ago… but man I still get the urge to download and play the classic version of the game that’s more chill and just explore the world and listen to the amazing music… I’ve got so much work to do and I’ve accepted a new identity as I’m not a gamer anymore. I unhooked my pc and it’s been in the closet for about seven months so even casual non Warcraft games are off limits now. My life has improved a good amount. I’m in better shape, my cooking has got a lot better, my work is improved, I’ve started walking etc. the funny thing was I used to game to unwind and recharge but I realized it actually makes me more drained… and yet here I am slight overwhelmed with work and craving to go back to it. Hmm…

I’ve watched the many attempts you’ve made over the years to share information. I watched you struggle and I’ve watched you be super successful.  Every time you’ve posted a video it’s been incredibly put together and full of quality content. The man I see before me now is more mature, put together, confident, self understanding individual and it’s very inspiring to watch your growth. Keep it up, brother.

2:49 Yeah, I’m currently watching it at 3 am

Taren Veyra talks about something really similar to this, especially how your beliefs can change what you notice and how you react to things.

I have been stuck in this loop for almost an year. The pain of destroying my life with my own hands forced me to dig deeper and I found your video. Everything in here makes sense to me and my only goal now is to get out of that loop.

Calling out the 'I just need to research more' trap was spot-on. Endless consumption of courses and how-to videos isn't preparation—it’s a socially acceptable escape mechanism to avoid the discomfort of being seen. If your baseline is waiting to feel 100% ready, you'll stay stuck in analysis paralysis forever. Doing the work scared and messy is the only way through.

" Give up your addiction to control " is the one that hit the spot right here
And you said something like : what if there's nothing to fix ? I added , self acceptance is the key .
Some parts of ourselves needs acceptance with kindness , not a need to control it or try to fix it .

Thanks for the video Clark ! Nice one 👏🏻

08:40 We will work harder not to lose something, than we will to gain something. This is so true. I've been doing it for far too long without realising.

4:30 being worried when things are going well is a real thing. Am an overthinker.

11:09 very much "pursuit of perfect at the expense of the good enough" vibes. Not everything needs to be done with the utmost of your skill and ability. Sometimes,  just doing a good job is far more than enough. Its a reminder i find myself needing often.

How do you know so much about me ? Literally everything? It’s 3rd time I am watching it on loop. And all the emotions I cried, got angry, smiled. I love you clark