In defense of the Goa´uld,
they have to face MacGyver and Kratos,
they never have a chance.

Tbf, the Goa'uld are canonically a stupid civ in universe, they just came first and have enemies who either aren't interested in policing the galaxy, or are too distracted to do so. The faults you list are basically how earth ultimately undermines and defeats them with the help of the Tok'ra and free Jaffa.

A serpent guard, a Horus guard and a Setesh guard meet on a neutral planet.

It is a tense moment.

The serpent guard's eyes glow.

The Horus guard's beak glistens.

The Setesh guard's nose drips.

Turns out tape worms with a god-complex are bad leaders.
Who would have thought that?

The "One L O'Neil" was a reference to the original O'Neil of the movie.  Yes, the show was at times self aware and a little goofy, but that's why people liked it.  And Richard Dean Anderson was given an honorary rank of Brigadier General for his positive portrayal of an Air Force officer on television which helped with Air Force recruitment.

Staff weapon: "This is a weapon of terror. It's made to intimidate the enemy."

P90:  "This is a weapon of war. It's made to kill your enemy."

Earth got absurdly lucky with the fact they stumbled onto Ra's secret world that no other system lord even knew the location of, bypassing the enormous fleets and armies of Jaffa and decapitating the Goa'uld leadership at the start of their conflict.

"He reckons it's just allergies, but I don't see any pollen or cat hair around here, unless he's allergic to sand."

Of course he is! It's rough, coarse, and it gets everywhere.

The Jaffa are buff cops who were trained in the warrior mythos, and they are sent by their terrible bosses to face off against an actual military force with complicated ideas like "reconnaissance" and "campaign objectives."

Turns out that the ONE systemlord that didnt get high from his own "I'm a god" propaganda and wasnt above being flexible regarding alliances and bending the knee when it was necessary, is the most dangerous one.

The reason why the Goa'uld switched from the unas to Humans is because I read the percentage of failure to take over a Unas was around 40%, due to their natural resistances, but the percentage of failure for Human's (even without the Jaffa incubation & sarcophagus bosting it to practically 100%) is around 15%. Goa'uld are also far far far smarter within a Human host than they are in an Unas, as well as being far more physically dexterous. In an Unas host they are stronger, more resistant to injury & have a greater ability to heal injury. This was from a comic, so I'm not entirely sure if it's considered canon. jaffa armour is specifically designed to combat Goa'uld plasma weapon technology & it's why Human weaponry easily defeats them.

Shol'va slop, the glorious Goa'uld have ruled for thousands of years and will rule for thousands more

I thought humans were the "superior host" because they were easiest to heal and keep alive indefinitely by the sarcophagus tech.

27:26 I always assumed the in universe reasons for how the Jaffa fight was that:                                                                                                                                                                                                                     1. Most "enemies" they'll fight are peasant uprisings/untrained combatants so strategies & skill with better weapons wasn't necessary.                                                                                              2. Keeping the rank & file soldiers armed/only trained with the less effective weapons helps prevent Jaffa uprisings.                                                                                                                              3. The humans taken as hosts are from primitive societies & thus (unknown to the Goa'uld) are likely feeding them their primitive biases about brute strength/being physically imposing is more important than skill &/or knowledge.

I feel like Baal had the best chance to actually win. He outlasted all of the other arguably more powerful system lords, and was always able to adapt to whatever situation he was in. What he should have done is used his clones to distract SG1 while he took a new host body and stayed on Earth to become rich and powerful without anyone knowing he was a Góa'uld.

I love how much the dysfunction of the Goa'uld was explored in the show. They got so incredibly lucky so early in their existence that their society never had to develop beyond the most basic level. The moment they started to experience organized resistance it all fell apart.

Nah, Teal'c has the absolute best dry humor.

"I've seen them destroy entire civilizations for absolutely no reason…simply because it gave them pleasure."

Well, that is a reason.

I find myself wondering how much pressure Ra was putting on the rest of the System Lords that they didn't wipe themselves out from in fighting LONG before SG-1 got involved. There are some hints that he was running pretty much the whole show until he got whacked out of nowhere and the System Lords kinda went nuts. [edit] Okay, yeah. You covered that.

Pissed myself laughing at the indeed cut. As a fan of both Voyager and Stargate, it was always amusing to me how similar the two characters were.