Title: “This is not cannon”

Someone in the distance: “IT IS TO ME!”

Imagine if someone used Wingardium Leviosa to carry around and fire a GAU-8 avenger. PORTABLE DOPAMINE GO BRRRRRRR

Florida Warlock should have his cousin Louisiana Witch.

"Fred, show 'em why you survive in this timeline!"
There is no other canon in Harry Potter, fight me.

Dear lord I just realised just how terrifying Florida Warlock is. In DnD, a warlock gets their powers from their patrons in exchange for either soul or something similar. These patrons are usually devil's, demons, gods, elder gods, eldritch beings etc. And usually, though not always, these beings give the warlock abilities to those who share their beliefs and morals.
So here is the question: What eldritch monstrosity could possibly be strong, brave, and/or insane enough to decide making a deal with Florida???
Furthermore, WHAT DID THEY TRADE FOR FLORIDAS POWERS?????

"IM NOT A BIG FAN OF THE GOVERNMENT" is essentially The Harry Potter Fandom Put into one Sentence, love this shit Fenrir Please make Moar when you have the time

"I can taste what BLUE sounds like..." I feel this. Though in my case it's not drugs or potions, it's my migraines.

Florida, a gift: Domain expansion: WAFFLE RAIN (they explode)

I hate how they say "electricity won't work" but  that overlooks the point that means your NERVOUS SYSTEM CANNOT FUNCTION!!!

"Oh at this point if you cant beat him, join him. PROFESSOR AMERICA WIZARD CAN I HAVE A GLOCK" Best line in the series

Bro cannonized the "Master has given Dobby a glock" meme

"Freddy, show 'em why you survive this timeline." is the best line in the damn series

"Oh my god, our Headmaster might be a criminal."

"NOW?!?! YOU'RE JUST FIGURING THIS SHIT OUT NOW?!?!"

Dumbledore: not a big fan of the government 30 on 30

Australia wizard: "I'm not super happy about guns in schools. So today we're gonna explore some alternatives! I'm gonna show you how to deck a dark wizard with a milk crate at 30 paces.
And as a deterrent, we're introducing a giant spider breeding program!"

10:40 Just realised how AW knows what happened in the forest and with dumbledore. He said it back when AW was talking to the king: His power isn't bullets and bombs, it's information. As a pentagon asset, AW and by extention the Pentagon probably has had plants and agents all through the wizarding world.

"I honestly can't tell anymore if we're unhinged or he is."
"Yes."
Best Line in series.

Umbridge being forced to read the promo reminds me of the scene in Hellsing Ultimate abridged with Jan and the communications guy
"Read the fuckin' paper"

"What part of this don't you get sacaley? I am no muggle and I am far from mere." -Florida Warlock.

There are many wizards in which having magic gives them an inflated ego. I'm the needle. - Jason, the America Wizard.