"want an equal relationship with men" is so funny everyone close your eyes and hold my hands and lets picture this beautiful world where dating as a trans person doesnt have you worrying about transphobia nonstop.

Trans men are always infantilised and treated as traumatised women. I feel bad for ya'll

"Yaoi is why women become trans" is indeed the trans man equivalent to autogynephilia. A lot of terfs use the term autoandrophilia now to talk about trans men based on sexual orientiation just like the original theory (a trans man to them is either a confused lesbian with internalized homophobia or a straight woman fetishizing gay men). Even though the original creator of AGP said that an equivalent to AGP doesn't exist in "women" (that is to say FTM people) because they're not as prone to having fetishes or whatever. It's a convenient narrative to transphobes so obviously they don't care

Also just like in the original theory, bi and ace folks straight up don't exist lol. Watch me as I fade into oblivion 🥀

i'm not too familiar with this particular thingy, but it does kinda remind me of those people complaining about how "they are turning all the femboys trans".

like, to me, it feels a lot more plausible that trans women like to dress femininely, even before they find out they are women, instead of there being some transgenderisator going around.

and similarly, it feels more plausible that gay trans men like to read stories about other gay men, even before they know that's what they are, instead of there being a transgenderisator going around.

Some people will see a probably troll online say they transitioned to be a yaoi boy one time and assume every trans man is like that and its actually wild

I’ve been in online trans spaces to some extent for almost 15 years now and this narrative of “trans men are only trans because of yaoi” is not new at all. The way that TikTok you reacted to is worded literally sounds exactly like some people’s “spicy takes” I saw on places like tumblr in 2012.

im a trans woman, and i transitioned despite yaoi lmfao

BL and yaoi are known for being (mostly) made by women for women, I think we would notice if they all just started to transition to men.

It's so funny to me when people come up with these stupid hypotheses to explain how transness isn't valid, and then their little conspiracies fall apart as soon as they have to apply them to real people.
- "Trans men are just trying to escape misogyny!" In come the feminist trans men, the ones actively embracing femininity and getting fake-claimed for it.
- "Trans men are fetishising gay men/Trans women are fetishising lesbians!" In come the straight, bisexual and aroace trans men/women.
- "Trans men are just self-hating lesbians/Trans women are self-hating gays!" In come the gay, bisexual and aroace trans men/women.
- "They're turned on by the idea of having male/female bodies" (this mostly is applied to trans women) in come the straight trans people as well as the studies showing that the average cisgender person also fits the criteria for the so called "fetishism" trans people supposedly have.
- "They're just confused and will grow out of it when they become adults!" In come the statistics showing the vast majority of trans adults are happy with their transition.
- "They've been indoctrinated!" In come the trans people who never even knew what being trans was and still knew that they didn't identify with the gender they were assigned. In also come the historical records of trans and other queer people forming secret societies and secretly transitioning or living double lives, during times where such behaviour was viewed as degenerate or legally punishable.

If your model has very obvious and common exceptions, it's not a good model.

EDIT after watching a bit more of the video: No, OP, you're not doing mental gymnastics. It's pretty clearly TERF rhetoric.

I realized i was trans when i wasnt allowed to play in mens sports as a child

If yaoi made ppl transition to men, then why do most trans woman (including lesbians) like yaoi and don't detransition cuz of it???

I doubt yaoi has the power to force masc ppl like that, lol.

I just think its crazy that some people think this way. Part of me realising i was trans is consuming yuri and going oh i don’t want to be a man in a relationship but i want to be the women but i don’t want to be with another man but that was way later when i started realising i was trans

i may be a gay trans man who likes yaoi, but i didn’t become trans BECAUSE of yaoi. it did help the process of cracking my egg when i realized that i could never see myself in straight or wlw relationships, only in mlm ones. i thought that i was fetishizing gay men for a good year at least, but i eventually realized why i was so drawn to yaoi. and i completely agree that the “dating a man as a man so that they treat me as an equal” thing is dumb af. i got lucky with my current bf, who’s cis and has always made me feel safe and comfortable in my gender (and in general), but i’ve definitely had shit experiences with chasers, especially pre-T. being a trans guy doesn’t automatically make you on equal ground with other guys

Yaoi is my job, and I feel like people dismiss it as fetishism and whatever because women are the main audience. Yaoi to me is just a funny word to use for what is basically just gay drama.

I’ve met two (online, with interaction not just reading)

They may not have been real! But they seemed real.

One said they can’t go to detrans spaces because detrans spaces often dislike trans folks and blame them for their mistakes and she just owned it. People are wrong sometimes, it is always a risk. She asked if it was fine if she stayed in the trans community and if folks would mind and everyone was just so accepting of her and like of course you can stay omg, just because you aren’t trans anymore doesn’t mean you don’t fit in when you’ve lived as us and with us for the last several years etc. They seemed so happy they had a place to be.

I’ve met another online who was a lesbian, and again, detrans, but not particularly interested in detrans spaces and she was like “hey, I’m not a dude, but I have testosterone voice with a AFAB body, is that unattractive” and yea, no one cared in the lesbian space and they weren’t anti-trans and I doubt they even used the word detrans because of it’s association

Meanwhile it’s like, often their biggest worry is the same worry every trans woman who missed the window has had to go through, like it’s rough, but lets not pretend it’s the end of the world, we* have to work with it too

*Edit: we meaning trans women, which is me and other people like me, not you

See this is the classic looney tunes “aha pronoun trouble” and I genuinely miss the art of talking about pronouns without it being about trans folks in some negative way

I always found the finding out you're trans through yaoi thing funny in my case,  pre transition and questioning after hiding how I felt since I was a kid, I didn't like yaoi because a lot of it was made for women (the stuff I saw) and a lot of the stuff that is used in womanly gaze centered media was just not something I was into. I was cool with furry bara back then though. I liked the diversity in body types with the chubbier body types. They looked more how I looked back then and it was refreshing having people see that as attractive or drawings and animations where that was considered attractive.

4:05 I mean even then if you socially transition for a long time and only have problems after starting medical transition, you’re probs just a trans person without dysphoria in that area (usually hormonal characteristics). A ton of nb people are like this in particular.

Thank you for this video. I've been questioning for a loooong time, and I get into these anxiety thought loops about „what if Im wrong what if Im just a confused girl what if I'm a fetishist what if Im too autistic bla bla bla”. And it is not helpful for me at all.

I am saving this video to rewatch when I'm stuck and need reassurance.

Im a trans man Yuri fan and I don’t see myself a woman , I just a very proud himedanshi

Thank you for making this so much. I’ve heard so many weird crap about trans folks.
Also I LOVE your outfit, absolutely awesome