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Autism, ADHD & Acceptance: A Conversation with Kaelynn Partlow

I Have ADHD

37,682 views

Autism isn’t one thing—it’s a spectrum of experiences, and Kaylin Partlow is here to set the record straight.

What does it really look like to live with both autism and ADHD?
In this honest, insightful conversation, Kristen Carder sits down with Kaelynn Partlow—autism advocate, therapist, and cast member from Love on the Spectrum—to unpack the realities of being neurodivergent in a world that often misunderstands both conditions.

They explore how ADHD and autism intersect, the challenges of medication and impulse control, and why communication differences are so often misread. Kaelynn shares her take on representation in media, the debate over calling autism a “superpower,” and the power of true self-acceptance.

Inside this episode:
💡Life with both autism and ADHD
💡How medication affects behavior and emotions
💡Understanding different communication styles
💡Why “bids for connection” often go unnoticed
💡The importance of accommodations for neurodivergent people
💡The truth behind the “autism as a superpower” idea
💡Breaking the stereotype of what it means to “look autistic”
💡Why representation in media matters more than ever

✨ Whether you’re autistic, ADHD, or love someone who is—this conversation will help you see neurodivergence through a lens of compassion, nuance, and truth.

Chapters
00:00 Introduction to Kaylin Partlow and Her Journey
02:57 Understanding Autism and ADHD
05:53 Navigating Medication and Its Effects
08:49 The Intersection of Autism and ADHD
12:08 Reality TV and Representation of Autism
14:55 The Concept of 'Looking Autistic'
17:50 Bids for Connection in Autistic Communication
20:33 The Role of Open-Ended Questions in Therapy
30:37 Navigating Communication Frustrations
34:41 Self-Accommodations and Tools for Autistic Adults
39:19 Understanding Social Accommodations and Acceptance
41:40 The Debate on Neurodiversity: Superpowers or Challenges?
46:46 Self-Acceptance Beyond Labels
50:57 The Harm of Labeling Neurodivergence as Superpowers
55:09 Acceptance vs. Behavior: A Delicate Balance

Also check out:
-Kristen's Website | https://ihaveadhd.com/home
-Kristen's Instagram | Instagram: i.have.adhd.podcast
-ADHD Symptoms | https://ihaveadhd.com/adhdsymptoms
-Get the FREE Perfectionism Course | https://ihaveadhd.com/perfectionism
-Subscribe to the I Have ADHD Podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify | https://ihaveadhd.com/podcasts

#AutismAndADHD #ADHDPodcast #NeurodivergentVoices

20 Comments

@i.have.adhd.podcast Creator 11 months ago Pinned

Be sure to subscribe ➡https://www.youtube.com/@i.have.adhd.podcast

@empoweringlifeproject 11 months ago

My entire life I thought I was a failure. When I was diagnosed with ADHD and then autism it changed my life. I no longer see myself as a failure. I just can’t do things like neurotypical people.

@ErrorRaffyline0 11 months ago

The way Kaetlynn describes being hungry but not having the desire to eat and "everything sounds disgusting". It so perfectly describes how it feels to be on meds when trying to eat.

@lunakoala5053 11 months ago

Very ADHD friendly comment section. Only 7 comments so far, so when I start scrolling comments, I'm back to watching the video in 5 seconds. 😂

@daphonaise 11 months ago

The lack of eye contact in this video feels incredible😭

@onevika13 11 months ago

OMG, it's like she's describing me who has been diagnosed with ADHD at 40, but so many things are still not explained by that. Now, it makes sense that I might also be on the spectrum. Asking for specificity and being called argumentative and accusatory is the story of my life since childhood. " Oh, she just like to argue" is the label I grew up with...

@shortblokej 2 months ago

So nice to see Kaelynn in a long-form video

@sloene72 4 months ago

Your guest is unapologetically herself. That is confidence! ♡

@Jessicasadd114 11 months ago

11:30 i am so okay with just watching youtube for hrs on end.
But then feel guilty playing the Sims for hours. Lol

@Meyli1 10 months ago (edited)

"Its a superpower" ...that attitude i think ties in to how society often infantalizes people who have adhd and/or autism. Look at how CUTE it is! How adorable! Put on that cape and go be a super hero!! It screams infatalization to me

@kimberleywilson9295 4 months ago (edited)

The "superpower" is the person learning to harness the power from something that they can not control within themselves. Learning yourself, being self-aware and figuring out how to live your best life. YOU did that, not the disability or disorder.

@daphonaise 11 months ago

I feel like if someoen asked me to be specific id ask them what they need me to be specific about😭

@daizey8536 12 days ago

For me seeing Kaylin in her really authentic way of being there is something very healing I can relate so much to her way of sitting, stimming and owning her facial expressions and her strong sense of self.

@twopointwow 4 months ago

While listening to this episode, I realized I do best listening to media, with an ear bud in one ear and sound cancelling head phones over the top - this conversation gave me, I guess permission to try it. Wow 🎉

@TammysDIYCorner 11 months ago

Really appreciated this video! As an AuDHD woman, this was relatable and super helpful. I feel so seen.

@dmistry8304 4 months ago (edited)

I really enjoyed this conversation and learned a lot. I'm undiagnosed but likely both. I found the conversation around conversing with others about autism really helpful.

I also changed my perspective slightly on the superpower thing. Im a coach too and I previously saw it as empowering even though I also acknowledged the challenges. Now I can see that instead of sticking with that as an absolute belief, it's actually a gateway to self-acceptance and beyond that, acknowledging the challenges is also self-acceptance. It's a stepping stone to self acceptance and then comes the second part, which is accepting the whole self. Sometimes it even happens the other way around. We accept the bad first and find some love for ourselves then we see our strengths.

I really appreciated the perspective Kaylin brought and her compassion for all humans. This is what I have been working on, myself for the last 8 years.

@springskyllark 11 months ago (edited)

I second the Kaelynn Show ✋maybe not like traditional reality TV, but I’d for sure watch more long form content like a podcast if that’s something Kaelynn wanted to do! Or just go on other pods you like bc this one was great 😊

@TianaMay2001 10 months ago

I think one of the only parts of Autism and ADHD that could be remotely considered a "superpower" is our hyperfocus. And sometimes in our speedy brains, we can find some really good ideas for businesses and projects and stuff, but I agree that neither are superpowers.

@TipsyArt-1 11 months ago

Under the idea of AuDHD is a superpower (It personally isn’t for me, but good on you if it is for you) I think people tend to think the same with dyslexia, I have REALLY bad dyslexia and grew up being told “it’s a superpower” (and it used to feed into overwhelming me with my autism causing more breakdowns) and just because I was creative means all the years of breaking down in class everyday was fine because I could write stories except I couldn’t write it because I couldn’t spell, so ya, I understand not thinking it’s a superpower because for most it’s not, including me