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Stop Consuming Other People's Lives and Start Living Your Own | The psychology of watching online

Carly Hampton

40,946 views

Have you ever finished watching someone else's quiet, beautiful life online and felt — not inspired — but somehow emptier? There's a reason for that. And it's worth understanding.

In this video essay, filmed over slow coastal days on the NSW south coast, I explore the psychology behind why we feel so pulled to consume other people's lives online. It's not just about entertainment or boredom. Research suggests there are deeper emotional needs driving that pull — and when we understand what we're actually seeking, we can start to meet that need differently.

I also share some scientifically supported strategies for disconnecting from the online world and reconnecting with your own life. And I want to be clear — this isn't a condemnation of watching other people's content. I'm a content creator. I love this community. But there's a difference between watching that genuinely enriches you and watching that replaces living. This video is about finding that line.

✦ What's in this video:
— The psychology of consuming other people's lives online
— Why we watch — the deeper emotional reasons
— Scientifically backed strategies to reconnect with your own life
— The difference between enriching content and escapism
— Cosy slow living footage from coastal Australia
— Homemaking, seaside walks & baking

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ABOUT ME ❤
Hi, I'm Carly, a thirty-something wife, mumma and former high school English teacher. I live in a sleepy, stunning coastal town in southern NSW, Australia 🇦🇺🌊

I am passionate about living my best life, while avoiding the hustle of modern culture and adopt a slow living mentality, creating beautiful moments in everyday activities 🌅 I love cleaning and organisation and aim to motivate others to have a beautiful, tidy space through my cleaning motivation videos 🙏 through establishing positive daily rhythms and habits 🌸 I have realised that so many beautiful things in life are free and find joy in exploring my local area, making conscious spending choices, minimising my impact and supporting small business 🌿

If these values ring true to you, I would love to have you stick around and join our lovely little online community 😊 💕

TAGS: doomscrolling, psychology of social media, screen time detox, digital minimalism, slow living, intentional living, JOMO, stop scrolling, slow living australia, south coast nsw, coastal australian life, intentional motherhood, slow living mum australia, digital wellbeing australia, mindful living australia, slow and savoured, carly hampton, consuming other peoples lives, slow living video essay, live your own life, hygge australia, romanticise your own life

20 Comments

@violababcock6950 10 days ago

I used to spend hours watching other people live the life I wanted. Travel vlogs, transformation videos, morning routines. Meanwhile my own life was on pause. The Hidden Traps of Self Sabotage by Dorean Kngg showed me I was not inspired, I was hiding, using their lives to avoid facing mine. I closed the app and opened my own life. Now I am the one living it. Thank you for this video.

@SimplyBeautiful516 13 days ago

Me agreeing with you. But also me binge watching videos like this. 😂

@thewomenlatelyshow1816 8 days ago

It was my 8 year old son who asked me why I’m always watching other people’s lives when he saw me watching YouTube yet again. Until he put it t that way, I had never thought of it that way. If I look back, watching YouTube excessively was the way I coped during my divorce. I think it’s time to do something about it

@ameliamonica5199 5 days ago

This has been one of the BEST eye opening videos I’ve watched this year.
Thank you for the genuine care, value and education you have shared
👌💛 #gold

@MaybeThisIsNormal 12 days ago

Life is depressing if you're always comparing your life to others

@eatwellnikki 7 days ago

I know why the algorithm sent me this video because I raised this same issue on social media post so glad I’m not the only one thinking this. When there is a consensus of similar thoughts in areas of life know that there will be a shift in how they target us if we are no longer consuming content 😌

@TamannaIslam-l5c9n 13 days ago

When you’re overwhelmed, it’s easy to think you simply need to toughen up. Anwen Reid’s anxiety quiz may help you understand that there can be more behind those feelings.

@TheBrosia07 2 weeks ago

This was just the video I needed today as a reminder on this topic! 💜

@melaniesministry 3 days ago (edited)

We all have our own personalities with lifestyle choices and to fulfil our lifestyle is to start living it, as living your own life is better than watching others fulfill theirs. Mindfullness & Wellbeing practices will help each individual to refocus on their own abilities that have been hidden or sabotaged for so long. Love your video & the chocolate cake brownies Blessings to you🕊

@wendyduncan9084 4 days ago

How synchronized is it that we had just been discussing how odd these one sided relationships are? I usually watch you when I have finished a set of chores I didn’t particularly want to do. Or when I’m soaking in the tub on the weekend. I treat it like a chocolate. Small doses and as a reward. I have noticed how much more I watch when I’m tired or it’s been a bad day at work. Cremating people can be really hard on my heart some days. This has been one of those weeks. This was my bribe to actually go cut the grass. So I’m putting the phone down and going into the garden. I hope you are too. 🧡

@GenNat1970 11 days ago (edited)

I have been thinking about this ALOT lately.......why am I watching OTHERS living THEIR lives? I do learn alot about others, and I have picked really good people to watch and get ideas from, so that's okay but agreed on the fact that we feel so close to these people, it's a bit much..... I am still living MY life, but even a few hours a day watching someone else is too much in my book!!! great topic, thanks for this video!!

@KatrinaLaGreca 13 days ago

Loved this video and the things you shared. Aligned so much with this and consuming social media.

I did 6 weeks without consuming facebook & logged in last night. Scrolled for 5 minutes and then though. Nope, I don't need this consumption in my life.

I will be keeping this a re- watch and reminder. This video was amazing ❤

@Moonbeam24-five 3 days ago

Unexpected! Yes, I am addicted to YouTube videos! Tomorrow I will tackle a sewing project instead of scrolling

@Marymc1987 6 days ago

Thank you so much for this video ❤please do more like this ❤❤❤

@sew_sow_sam 13 days ago

This was so timely Carly, thank you!

@sylviacarlson3561 2 days ago

I think this was an inspiring video. I don't have t.v. (my choice) and I am not addicted to my phone. So boring! But I do spend some time on YouTube. I'm not going to beat myself up about it because I live alone and yes, I get lonesome for friendship. I have friends in a group sense, not a one-on-one, which I miss. I am involved in many activities so it's not like I'm not socializing, but I haven't found someone I really click with that's mutual. I am doing two things I'll pass on. In the morning I go and sit on my porch with my coffee and do nothing but look out at my front yard and admire the birds and pet the outdoor cats that come for a pet and some food and water. How many of us just sit and do nothing? Why do we always have to have activity going every second of the day? I don't think it's good for our health. It's very peaceful. Then I read my spiritual magazines and a chapter in the book I'm currently reading. It will calm you. Plus I'm now doing Tai Chi exercises, which are very easy and yes they are free on YouTube. Try it. It will wake up your body in the morning. God Bless you all and I truly hope you have a serene and peaceful day and night.