I read the title fine

I like how some of these are just small mistakes and the others are my worst fears 💀

they were so scared of that last guy they gave them the job just in case 💀

"Are you currently employed?"
"Thank you."

2:02 nah, in that case, you pretend the two different shoes were an intentional, avante garde, fashion choice. In the words of Andy Warhol "art is anything you can get away with".

"Creamy handshake" is something that sits with that person forever

“Are you an assertive person?”
“NO. Absolutely not.”

Can't believe you got it into the cup first try, then recorded a bunch of misses just to make us believe you missed it a bunch. So humble

The word “ameliorific” doesn’t exist, but the word “ameliorate” does, and it means “to make better.” With that in mind, to be “ameliorific” could mean that you’re able to go into a bad situation and make it better.

I once messed up a job interview in multiple fatal ways, then got the job anyways because I told the interviewer “look, I’m extremely qualified for this job, I’m just extremely unqualified for being interviewed”.
I mean, I was right. It was a basement-dweller IT job that was entirely by email or phone with the understanding that if something was really physically wrong I might have to drive over to the office and  plug things back in. I can send a perfectly cordial email, but put me in front of a flesh-and-blood interviewer and I freak out.
I’m not sure if they appreciated my honesty or if no one else applied, but I got the job.

“what would you do if i asked you to do something you don’t want to do?”

i replied with a five minute rant about the nature of morality before he stopped me to explain that he meant it in reference to cleaning the bathrooms.

I’ve never had a job interview fiasco, but one time, I was auditioning for a play, and this girl, when given a scene to read, apparently forgot how scripts work and said her character’s name before every line. She got the part.

I know of the "if it was a snake, it would have bit me" saying. It is when you can't find something when it is right there. Thus, if it was a snake, it would have bitten

Interviewer: "What is your biggest weakness?"
Me: zones out for 10 seconds
Me: "this question apparently."

“Do you have any experience with kids?”
“I mean I was one”
Technically they’re not wrong. That is a more than valid point.

Out of all people, the one to say he was gonna blow up a library got a job

I remember when we were given the task to write 10 things you should never do at a job interview. Well, the only rule was that you shouldn't do it, not that you could or wanted but shouldn't. So my list ended up sounding like this:
Wear a swimsuit, insult the boss, do crimes, bring an elephant, practice witchcraft, etc.

Gonna have to consider signing my future letters "sinisterly" from now on.

Once interviewed for a position at a Catholic non-profit hospital. Turned around on the main stairway too quickly when I heard someone call my name and knocked an elderly nun down a flight of stairs. Like, more than a dozen stairs. I can still hear the thuds.

7:18 I feel like the company should've been more careful cuz that's a real easy way to get sued, by causing injury after misinforming a potential new employee on the type of welding they're doing because it makes a real difference in terms of safety