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The "Hidden Reason" Your Spouse Won't Take Responsibility

Affair Recovery

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What effect does narcissism have in the aftermath of an affair? 👀READ Article Here: https://www.affairrecovery.com/newsle...

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When an affair wreaks havoc, betrayed partners need to feel seen, heard, and validated. What they’re often met with is a wayward mate who is defensive, blaming, and unable to display empathy. For some, this is temporary. For others, it’s a sign of a more significant problem that may require professional help. Today, Tracey helps us identify what narcissism looks like and offers helpful next steps for both the betrayed and the wayward.

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⚠️Disclaimer: Our resources are curated by experts but do not substitute for professional therapy. If you need personalized help, please seek out a qualified therapist or counselor. If you are in crisis, contact emergency services in your area. Transparency note: Some links above and in the comments may be affiliate links, which allow us to continue providing valuable resources for your recovery journey.

14 Comments

@AffairrecoveryLLC Creator 5 months ago Pinned

Infidelity's pain is real for both partners; seeking change takes immense courage.
We offer a free, confidential call to help you find your path to healing.
To get call info, comment: 'NEED CHANGE'
Or share: What's the hardest part about the future for you?
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@thomaslin1600 5 months ago

Cheaters’ Handbook

1) You're being paranoid / you’re being dramatic / you’re being over thinking
2) He's like a brother to me / just friend / co-worker / work husband / soul mate
3) You're just insecure
4) Don't make this weird
5) I don't know why you don't trust me
6) We just vibe
7) He gets me in a way no one else does / made me wanted / connected me
8) It's not what it looks like / it’s not what you think
9) Why don't you trust my friends
10) You never listen to me / you had been distant / I deserved better / I was lonely / I wanted to be desired
11) It’s mistake / people make mistakes / you make mistake too / I was confused / I never mean it / it’s a miscommunication / It means nothing / I needed closure / It's complicated / It just happened / it’s complicated
12) I still love you / I don’t love him / I never mean to hurt you
13) You will be regretting this / you are making a mistake
14) We can fix this / I will change / we can go counseling / I am sorry / we can re-set / we can start over

@foxglove589 5 months ago

Hang on a minute please! So these poor narcissists feel a terrible sense of shame do they? There’s a simple way to avoid that by NOT CHEATING! Simple when you think about it 🙄

@pixiepianoplayer114 5 months ago

"Loving at times " is tantamount to hearing a lock click shut on the cage of abuse they shut you in.

@daborael 5 months ago

I am going through this right now and I don't think my marriage is going to survive it.

@vickihogan8207 5 months ago

Codependency has no part in the betrayed spouses pain! That adds more layers of guilt on someone who has been crushed by a selfish addict! Run from anyone that teaches betrayed partners are codependent!

@SheStead 5 months ago

YES. THANK YOU. you have no idea how many of us betrayed are being controlled by this behavior.

@Phil3Eight 2 months ago

Good explanation for what has been our reality for the past 16 years. I wondered about covert narcissism, but wouldn't have thought to connect it to grandiosity.

@nickiarnold289 5 months ago

Recovery from an affair is an entirely different ballgame when dealing with a spouse who has NPD. Nothing seems to be “textbook”. Thanks so much for putting these helpful messages out there as they truly bring a degree of understanding to what has been SO hard to comprehend.

@shellymiller9152 5 months ago

Yup mine dies this. Flips the script and blames and accuses me of exactly what hes done😢. Im so tired of it all. I feel hopeless anymore

@sarieasley3912 5 months ago

EXCELLENT INFORMATION, THANK YOU!

@NoMoreRatRaceForMe 5 months ago

If they cheat. You have to leave them. Have respect for yourself. And know that you can do better. This is a liar, a deceiver, a cheater that could give you a disease.

@Bruce-w2p3j 1 month ago

Going through this now she gets angry when you bring it up . the affair was 27 years ago but i just found out about it a year ago she feels to a shamed that it happened dont want to talk about it anymore .