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13 Ugly Habits in Old Age That Make People Avoid You But They Are Afraid to Tell You

Retirement Transformed

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One of the hardest truths about getting older is that people rarely tell you when your behavior is pushing them away. Instead, they simply spend less time with you. In this video, I share 13 common habits that can quietly damage your relationships with family, friends, and the people you care about most. From constant complaining and always needing to be right to giving unsolicited advice, talking too much about your health, becoming too rigid, carrying grudges, and expecting special treatment, these are the behaviors I've seen drive people apart. My hope is that this conversation encourages you to take an honest look at yourself, strengthen your relationships, and make your later years your most connected, meaningful, and fulfilling yet.
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Welcome. We’re Mark and Jody Rollins, and this channel is a community for people who want more from retirement than slowing down. Here, we explore the real-life side of the Discovery Years, from rebuilding identity and energy to strengthening relationships and finding purpose.

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20 Comments

@laurenj8888 3 weeks ago

1. Complaining
2. Always needing to be right.
3. Unwanted advice to children
4. Poor grooming
5. Talking about yourself too much.
6. Talking constantly about your health.
7. Getting more rigid about your life and routines make people stop including you.
8. Criticizing the younger generation.
9. Repeating old stories can reveal you need new ones.
10. Expecting everyone else to initiate creates your own loneliness
11. Using your age as an excuse, makes others think you are old
12. Expecting special treatment eventually wears other people down.
13. Carrying old grudges makes everyone around you carry them.

@karlabritfeld7104 12 days ago

Everything you don't like isn't only with old people... It's ALL people

@RetirementInConfidence 2 weeks ago

I wonder if there’s another side to this. As we get older, maybe we don’t always become harder to be around — maybe we just become more selective about who we spend our time with. At some point, peace and a few meaningful relationships can feel better than a large social circle. Has anyone else noticed themselves wanting fewer friends as they’ve gotten older?

@silviahoffmann158 2 weeks ago

I have to say my number one peeve. Is when people talk and then they don't listen to you when you have anything to say. As a matter of fact, they interrupt you, as you're talking

@Traci_Loves_Daisies 3 weeks ago

Everyone I encounter is a talker. It’s exhausting being the listener ALL the time!!!

@emiliebova 3 weeks ago

I think doing what you want after age 65 is the best part of getting old.

@Retirementrealigned 3 weeks ago (edited)

When I retire Im going to watch tv all day long. Im not going to meddle in my kids business, Im not going to have a bunch of useless friends.
Im going to enjoy my life at 65 after working 44 years. Thank you.

@catstitchstudio 3 weeks ago

Great list. I have one to add. Don't gossip about other people. When someone talks about someone else, it tells me they are not trustworthy. They could (and probably would) just as easily talk about me when they're with others. No, thanks.

@TheOldHippiebilly 3 weeks ago (edited)

I'm 67 and still work part-time in a kitchen. My coworkers are all 20- & 30-somethings. I LOVE these kids! They keep me young at heart and often say things like "You don't SEEM old" 😍

@richardbeard6100 3 weeks ago

I am fine with people avoiding me , just as i avoid them .

@eddiegilbert6858 3 weeks ago

I'm 65 being alone is not so bad you get use to it after a while

@petewilson2314 3 weeks ago

Hard truth, not only for older folks but everyone really

@william8654 3 weeks ago

We spent a winter at an over 55 community in Florida, but the average age seems to be 65 and over. After a month my wife said we need to get out of here as it is making us old fast! And there are plenty of "Grumpy old women too" We want to be around different age groups not just a bujnch of geezers. Heard one guy telling the same story 5 times and they are always topping each others injuries and surgeries!!

@JennifersjourneysLI 3 weeks ago

Fantastic list! Another rule… don’t be a “one upper”! For example, you say something like oh I drew a picture of a beach today & someone will say well I am an artist and paint masterpieces of the beach & sell them for a ton of money! Drives me crazy.

@stevencronin459 3 weeks ago (edited)

I want people to stay away from me.I'm much happier with less people in my life.

@chrisschene8301 2 weeks ago (edited)

I understand that my children might resent unsolicited advice, but that works in both directions. My daughter who is a medical professional, offers me unsolicited advice all the time: I don't want the unsolicited medical advice. I have my own doctors, and I follow their advice.

If my children or grand children have an issue with my appearance, or the slang or colloquialisms that I use, they need to understand that I am also from a different time, language and customs, and have no intention of changing to please them or others. For extreme things, such as extremely offensive language, I can adjust.

I went back to college after retirement to study things I enjoy and I do have many new stories and new things I have learned My day is filled with going to classes, doing homework, learning new skills. I have new experience with my fellow college students, I visit national parks, I travel to foreign places.

@jm7804 3 weeks ago

The forgiveness one is huge. People think forgiveness lets someone off the hook. It does not. Karma still comes for them either way. The only person off the hook is you. No more hate in your heart.