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5 Stages of Subspace (And How to Get There Faster)

Dom Sub Living

61,789 views

Most subs think they've experienced subspace. They haven't – not really.
In this episode, we're breaking down all 5 stages of subspace and how to get there faster – including the one stage nobody warns you about that can quietly damage your dynamic if you're not handling it right.
If you're a a Dom who wants to guide your partner there or a sub who wants to go deeper, this one's for you.

➡️ Grab your free sample scene: https://domsubliving.com/scene
➡️ Show notes and more: https://domsubliving.com/139

0:00 Introduction
1:20 What is subspace? (The real explanation)
3:04 The physiology of subspace
4:26 Why you can't always drop in
4:34 Stage 1
6:41 How to build your pre-scene ritual
7:50 Stage 2
9:31 What doms should do at stage 2
10:08 Story: Dropping in when you're stressed
11:38 How to get to stage 2 faster
12:53 Stage 3
14:59 Why dom consistency matters most here
15:39 Story: The Apple Watch moment
16:53 How to deepen stage 3
17:56 Stage 4
19:01 Why surrender can't be forced
20:38 What doms need to know at stage 4
22:35 Stage 5
24:42 What keeps subs from reaching stage 5
25:28 What it feels like (from the community)
26:08 Subdrop: The hidden stage
26:49 How to handle subdrop
27:28 Wrap-up & takeaways
28:09 Free sample scene resource

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20 Comments

@DomSubLiving Creator 4 months ago Pinned

✨ Grab your free sample scene: https://domsubliving.com/scene

@ramblinevilmushroom 4 months ago

I thought this video was about star trek when I clicked on it.

@Faustian_Bargain_Bin 4 months ago (edited)

My algorithm is going to be ruined after I watch this

@stephanieherman2861 4 months ago

i came here in preparation to my next test.i thought this is about mathematics. just for info:

If V is a vector space over a field K, a subset W of V is a linear subspace of V if it is a vector space over K for the operations of V. Equivalently, a linear subspace of V is a nonempty subset W such that, whenever w1, w2 are elements of W and α, β are elements of K, it follows that αw1 + βw2 is in W.

The singleton set consisting of the zero vector alone and the entire vector space itself are linear subspaces that are called the trivial subspaces of the vector space.

@bernardhayes4459 4 months ago

Brillant explaination. Only recently did I experience subspace for the first time, and it felt life changing, and instantly addictive. My Dominatrix put a chastity cage on me and this triggered the drop.

@AmieMartin-s4u 4 months ago

The first time I reached this stage I was completely disconnected from reality. It was amazing and my Dom was fully aware and present thru this with me. The aftercare was there and although we've had allot of scenes I've only reached this stage a handful of times. When it happens it's like winning the lottery!! You explained this perfectly🖤🖤

@dan8402 4 months ago

All of this are excellent points. Also we Doms are not mind readers. I think it really helps to sit and talk with your sub in a free form format. Talk about what they need to get there as it were. What steps to take that they feel work best for them, or if neither of you are sure, try different things. Like a science experiment.
Getting our subs to Subpsace is pleasurable for us as well. We want to learn what your needs are, and how we can facilitate the best consensual experience possible.
D/S is a framework to provide order. The exact framework is unique to each dynamic. It is not a one size fits all. Get that communication going and make it happen. 💜💜

@kojiromusashi13 1 month ago

This experience sounds so incredibly powerful! I have a hard time even imagining it, but wow.

@sree_arup 3 months ago

One thing that stood out to me was your focus on helping people understand the process rather than just the outcome. I appreciate how you challenged common oversimplifications and provided a more thoughtful framework for understanding the topic. Thanks for sharing such a well-organized and informative perspective.

@Cath-ion35 4 months ago

ngl saw the space background and I was really thinking of Star Trek LMFAO!

@Dreamer5211 2 months ago

Thank you for such a kind and well presented explanation of 'sub-space '. For me , entering that space is , well , total mind and body letting go .
You become aware , but not -- it is like another version of you is being explored and almost an out of body type of thing . -- However , total love and trust has to be present , the dom can never leave the sub alone in this state - for me , touch , soft gentle affirmation that I am still here , but somewhere else -- it is complicated . After can be either the best part or the worst -- being in sub-drop alone sucks -- being in sub-drop with total given cared for is the ultimate way back . A soft road back from a very quiet space , hearing sound again -- seeing again , being put back in control of me -- again . Well , this dynamic is not for everyone , but it can be an amazing thing if both the sub and the dom are in this together .

@kileyhanson1203 4 months ago

I've only had one Dom be able to really achieve that deep subspace with me but omfg was that some of the best experiences of my life and it really did take a lot of time and trust and just right phrases from him. Honestly it is really nice to get to have this affirmation that it is really difficult to do and can make you question your status as a sub if you have trouble getting there

@philipdavis7521 4 months ago

This is one of the most eloquent descriptions I've ever heard - plus great advice. Thank you.

@NoMythHere 4 months ago

PHENOMENAL framework you’ve created here. You have an incredible gift for taking complex topics and crafting accessible ways into a topic in ways that are not only understandable but usable. So glad you included info on sub drop. Cheers!

@Kinkucation_Wildside 4 months ago

So far great video, currently watching.

I'm a pet, and I have figured out an easy way (for me) to get into pet/sub space.

I've been doing this for over 2 years, I usually only wear my pet hood when I get into that space. And I have noticed that it does help when I only use it for those activities. Doesn't always work, yet helps.

And yes, I do agree it is extremely to get into complete headspace. I have only been in 2/3 times that I was completely engulfed by it and it was because I completely trusted the person I was with.

I always love seeing your videos, thank you.

@pugetlexus 4 months ago

To an outsider, a listener and ponderer, of your comments, the process you describe seems to me requires a high level of intelligence in addition to the other motivating factors: need desire, affection attentiveness or whatever else that also plays into the D/S relationship.

To understand your comments needs a sharp mind , to experience or be active in this process seems to require uncommon effort and intelligence. Raw brain power. This process of steps seems , to my ignorant ears, to encompass every characteristic of what we generally define as being human or being a living thing
Patterns,
understanding
acquiescence,
Trust
Awareness of ones own self and the needs that self must have met
It seems the stages encompass what it means to be fully human.

And for the Dom. There must be some kind of corollary of meeting these stages in the sub.

Fascinating info. Thank u.

@Me1usine 4 months ago

Ooooh, this is not a science fiction type of subspace!

With my algorithm it could have been either but I might have opened it up in a different place.

@SuperVancelot 3 weeks ago

Wonderful, haha, it inspires my practice. An authentic 5 element acupuncture session takes one to deep subspace using tiny needles and burning moxa on the acupuncture point. Never realized how sexy an acupuncture ritual can be. Boundaries agreements and caring are everything