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My 20-Year-Old Husband Has Given Up on Life

The Dr. John Delony Show

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My 20-Year-Old Husband Has Given Up on Life

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20 Comments

@lizwiens671 1 year ago

What a sweet soul. She’s a fixer, she doesn’t know how to be anything else. She married a project and she can’t save him, he needs to save himself.

@adoseofcourage 1 year ago

19 going on 52. She sounds like a woman who has LIVED life. That’s what parentalization does to kids. Robbing them of the experience of weightlessness that childhood confers. I pray they both heal individually and that she stops being a martyr and starts revealing her authentic self that is buried underneath the caretaker identity.

@MariRodriguez333 1 year ago

This woman at 19 is more mature than most of us at 40. Proud of her for having the courage for growth. You're going to be ok!

@Jenafur7 1 year ago (edited)

The problem is that two unhealed people decided to get into a relationship thinking they would heal each other. This is prime example of a trauma bonding relationship.

@square3one921 1 year ago

This guy has won the lottery, and he better realize it quick.

@shannalee80 1 year ago (edited)

The biggest problem isn’t marrying young - I’ve seen many cases where it works out well. But what almost NEVER works at any age is marrying based on someone’s “potential”. You have to assume that the person you’re dating or marrying is the “finished model”.

@Some_kind_of_wonderfü 1 year ago (edited)

I have a 19 year old … I just wanna hug this little lady so much 🥺💚 she’s taken on so much that’s not hers

@JillCrato 1 year ago

'We marry our unfinished business'. OMG! I'll stay happily single forever and work on myself with my psychologist.

@euroboy919 1 year ago

My wife and I married in 2006. I was 20 and she was 18. Engaged at her high school graduation. No, we were not having a baby. I honestly knew she was my person. Didn’t have any plan but knew I could work hard. Best decision of my life! 19 years and counting this coming June. We have come through poverty to success. It’s possible. Marriage is work but like anything worth working for, man it’s so worth it. I wish this woman the best..

@valaries.5944 1 year ago (edited)

I wish I had seen more compassion on this message board today. Let's not focus on age, it's done .Let's focus on how the problem has a solution. Thank you, John, for yours. She desperately needs it.

@EmilyLucille523 1 year ago

11:00 - “Your husband doesn’t need a Mom, just a safe place to land.” It took me almost 25 years of marriage and my husband at 52 years old for me to finally get this. Changing my view point to this has saved our marriage.

@jerrystauffer2351 1 year ago

Peace feels like stress to you. That hits hard

@Lespritdelescali 1 year ago

It always breaks my heart when people say they were "homeschooled" but they were not actually educated - they were used as home staff. If his mother was never home and she was nursing her sick father, she wasn't homeschooled. She was unschooled. I am so sorry for her.

@CJCafe 1 year ago

I'm proud of her for seeking help. She got some great advice. It's so hard to watch someone you love suffer.

@Myraisins1 1 year ago

This young lady sounds way beyond 19yrs old.

@lacelace9331 1 year ago

Hearing her say she's tired broke my heart. I didn't realize it when I was in her spot at 18, hearing such a young voice sounds so actually tired damn near made me cry

@MargareteJBSousa 1 year ago

😢 His situation looked familiar for her, therefore attractive...

@knill1494 1 year ago

I've been in his boat, the encouragement of my wife helped me tremendously. I chose to do what was best for my family, keeping myself alive and healthy.

@neogbfe3587 1 year ago

I had someone leave me at my lowest, I loved that they left me. It helped me realize, life doesn’t owe you anything, don’t live life clinging onto one person and realize the end is inevitable.

@RandyLott 1 year ago

Being mature as a child is a huge burden. My dad died suddenly when I was 12, and my mom had undiagnosed bipolar disorder.

This is me. I had to make sure my mom was okay.

No one asked if I was okay, and I wasn't taught that I needed to think about myself sometimes.

I feel like my only value is when I'm fixing something.

I wish her well. She sounds like a really good person.