📺 Watch the full episode here
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAgGirY-GUQ&ab_channel=TheDiaryOfACEO

The lawyer nailed it by identifying defensiveness as a huge part of why slippage happens. You try to address issues, but if you're always beaten off, eventually you stop trying. The other party thinks it's great because you're not addressing issues anymore. But it's because, inside, you've already moved on and are just looking for the courage and right moment to tell them.

Contempt is the final horseman predicting the end of the relationship.

The plot is CONNECTION. When couples lose that, they lose everything.

Therapist here. The host hit on an important thing: not arguing is not necessarily a good thing. Healthy arguing, discussion, negotiation is actually VERY important. Also, the lawyer talked about personal attacks (not his words) and that is also death to a relationship.

Lack of attention, laziness, being taken for granted, drinking - led to my marriage ending !

Female attorney here.  I don't see how one marriage can maximize two careers. If both of you come home  "wiped out" due a a long day, there is no energy left for your spouse or your home life.

4:48 “This person is not yours, this person is loaned to you.”

Or if your spouse is addicted to be on their phone 24 seven and you just feel ignored!

Lawyer is as much a therapist as a lawyer. Very knowledgeable.

Watering the plant is very good analogy. Anyone that has taken up gardening understands what it takes to maintain a good garden. The foundation is as equally important as the maintenance. The same thing is true of long sustainable good marriage!

Taking things for granted and neglect are two of life's greatest sins.

We forget that our relationship is a living thing that needs attention and nurture, sometimes until it’s 20 years too late 😔

Narcissists vs Empath

Thank god I have a man who listens and cares so much. I'm so grateful for him!

I could listen to this lawyer all day
He is so full of understanding of human behaviour as a result of watching  the collapse of others relationships

Major relationship red flags that I've seen in my life and that I've seen other people go through:
1) Drug addiction
2) Behavioral addictions such as gambling, porn, serial infidelity, etc.
3) Financial irresponsibility.
4) Psychological issues, such as BPD, severe victim mentality, or high drama people.
5) Female menopause or male midlife crises (major underrated issues IMO).

Great marriage advice to remember here. I’m gonna go water our plant now😊

Divorce happens when one party feels dominated and used, when the other party benefits at the expense of you.

This lawyer  would be a good actor!! He's  so good at explaining  with emotions!