In my opinion, I don't think the underlying message of this play is, "Stop acting like life is a party," or, "live a wiser life... and be who you are... an adult." This play depicts the exact opposite of what one of the speaker's just said. Through the character of Sir Toby, adults are taught to live freely and not take life seriously. We, society, should enjoy our lives; and then I suppose find some balance between being grown-up and lively freely.
wow i really liked this. it was very helpful in understanding the story of the play. i have an audition to be in an adaptation of this play, so this was very helpful.