OpenTube

Why Women Lose Desire in Long-Term Relationships

Dr. Kelly Casperson, M.D.

6,077 views

What if the secret to better sex isn’t a new position or a fancy toy — but understanding desire, pleasure, connection, and your own body?

In this episode, Dr. Kelly Casperson sits down with sexuality researcher and educator Nicole McNichols to unpack why women lose desire in long-term relationships, the myth of spontaneous desire, how stress and mental load affect libido, and why pleasure is essential for health and intimacy.

They also discuss:
• Responsive vs spontaneous desire
• Why novelty matters in long-term relationships
• The science behind attraction and “heated rivalry”
• Female anatomy most people were never taught
• Hormones, menopause, and midlife sexuality
• Why communication is actually hot

This is the sex education women should have gotten years ago.

Subscribe: @kellycaspersonmd

Dr. Kelly Casperson is a board-certified urologic surgeon, sex educator, and CEO of The Casperson Clinic, specializing in hormones, sexual health, and midlife wellness. This channel is your go-to resource for science-backed insights on intimacy, desire, and thriving in midlife.

Through expert advice and candid conversations, Dr. Kelly helps women overcome myths about sexual health, demystify hormones, and create fulfilling relationships. Whether you’re navigating menopause, seeking to improve intimacy, or simply want to prioritize your health, this channel offers practical tips to help you live confidently and vibrantly.

If you love the "You Are Not Broken" podcast, don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share it with someone who needs to hear it!

Your support helps more people find this life-changing information — and keeps the conversations we should have been having all along going strong.

🎯 Want more?
Check out courses, clinic info, and all things midlife mastery at kellycaspersonmd.com.

📚 Books by Dr. Kelly Casperson:
Grab You Are Not Broken: Stop Should-ing All Over Your Sex Life at Barnes & Noble, Amazon, or your favorite local bookstore. https://a.co/d/h8SOIrV

And Menopause Matters: Science, Hormones, and Mindset for Optimal Longevity https://amzn.to/42Y2DrG

Medical Disclaimer:
This content is for informational, educational, and entertainment purposes only. It’s not medical advice and shouldn’t replace talking with your own healthcare team. Always reach out to your doctor or qualified provider with any questions about your health. Use this information at your own risk.

#youarenotbroken #drkellycasperson #hormonetherapy

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10 Comments

@katem6861 4 months ago

We married late, in our early 40’s, now in mid 50’s and everything is so wonderful now. I never imagined we’d turn out this way, better than when we were younger! Hormone replacement helps plus strong relationship and faith all contribute to our good life. Thank you docs for bringing the right information ❤

@KimPage9617 4 months ago

As a baby boomer sex was not discussed it was made out that a man always instigated sex not the woman. I always felt that my desire was never met and said nothing. I still say nothing. My marriage broke up recently and it was said he always initiated sex and wanted me to start so I tried and then he couldn’t even complete sex. Was it me who was doing things wrong. I don’t know and now I feel like I failed. As you say if you always have chicken you don’t know any different. I have discovered much later in my life now that I have desires, wants, needs and so much more and will I get the opportunity with a new man if I get the chance. Just discovering about hormones as this was also never discussed. Now I find myself as an older woman discovering all of these things I missed out on my whole life. Hoping I get to learn more.

@GlobalMenopauseCollective 4 months ago

This is such an important conversation because women’s desire is often misunderstood or reduced to technique. Stress, mental load, hormones, connection, and feeling safe in the body all matter.

@veronicahernandez5507 4 months ago

❤❤❤ i have learned so much from you

@G0t2Runnnn 4 months ago

Just left my Dr office requesting hormones. Was told no rx 5 years after menopause!!! How the heck does one find a physician who prescribes hormones???!!

@tracybenson6391 2 months ago

Can I watch heated rivalry in the UK?

@pattywax2657 3 months ago (edited)

my boyfriend eatstacos literally everyday 😆 (yes, literal tacos)

@RhodaHall-ts3yw 1 month ago

Breast cancer: My GYN says no hormones my onco says absolutely not, my Gp says let’s try. 8 months on testosterone and 8 month on glp1. Let’s start estrogen no. Let’s find out if your thyroid is working well it’s not because two pieces of the triangle are missing. What the what! Ja dropped but still not on estrogen and progesterone. I’m miserable yet again. Hugeeeeeee rage.