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Your Toxic Coworker Should NOT Like You

Jennifer Brick

8,601 views

You've been told your whole career that being liked is the key to success. It's a lie. And it's been weaponized against you. In this video, I'm breaking down the Likability Trap that keeps high performers agreeable, overworked, and overlooked, and the 3 Switches you need to escape it for good.

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This video is for entertainment purposes and should not be construed as career counseling, legal advice, financial advice, medical advice, or other. We encourage individual consultation with professional Career strategists, therapists, etc. All views expressed are opinions.

To protect their privacy, all names and identifying information have been changed.

Post-Toxic Job Syndrome is not an actual, professionally recognized medical or psychological diagnosis. Recommendations included in this video to aid in your toxic job recovery are not offered by a doctor, are generalized, and are not individual for your unique circumstance, so they may not apply to everyone and should not be taken as medical advice. All responsibilities lie with the individual and not Capdeca Solutions, LLC. The after effects of a toxic job can be serious. Please contact your medical provider if you have concerns about your mental and/or physical health as a result of a toxic work experience.

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15 Comments

@anoretu1995 5 months ago

This is not entirely true. If people at work do not like you and you need to complete tasks with them, they can easily sabotage you, or at the very least, they may refuse to help you. This can ultimately cause you to fail.
They can also easily share negative feedback about you, which may influence your manager’s opinion. Even if you are a very successful person, they may still see you as someone who is not a team player. Yes it doesn't matter much but it is better if they didn't dislike you atleast majority of them.

@Aieshoo 5 months ago

Some people can never be pleased.

@JOHNBARRETT-r2q 3 months ago

I am friendly at work but never friends, do not trust anyone

@PennyJ81 5 months ago

I don’t care if I’m liked or get fired. I do my job, help where I can. If people have a problem with me it’s their problem.

@undeadspace9623 5 months ago

The reputation is easy to build, but it’s also easyer to destroy, be careful!

@Jupiterxice 4 months ago

Listen once you get pass 40 you should only care about your money and thats it. Your job is a job and your coworkers are not your friends. Get your money and leave at the end the day.

@SiriSavir 4 months ago

That’s too much to deal with.

@Vinavinavibes 3 months ago

Reputation = do people like you. That’s the actual formula so yes you need to be liked

@violettovar3590 5 months ago

Thank you Jennifer for this video! Just in time too. I just applied for a new job (not escaping a toxic one) that is more in line of my interest. BTW completely amused that you use my name in the Violet example. Not only is that name super rare today but that behavior is everything I fear. HAHAHA! Have a great day!

@gerardsloan1593 5 months ago (edited)

Great content. I learned this lesson sometime ago and multiple times. Unless you are naive (or still at school), you will experience this or witness it. It is uncomfortable, you can use it to your advantage because it can help you remove bs and distractions from you and your career. I do think you can have a healthy positive and relationship with all your colleagues (have boundaries in place just like any other relationships). Remember, your employer has no loyalty to you, they will convince you that you are important until it doesn't suit anymore. Your colleagues and "friends" have no loyalty to you either. Once you know this, you are on a good path in terms of career development. Opinions are my own. Have a good day reader.

@taurahelms3068 5 months ago

I work with people like Violet. I also work with plenty of people who go through the motions and care on a daily basis. 😰

@earthsteward9 5 months ago

Off topic but please don't give your employer a 5 star review on glassdoor or indeed just because your supervisor is cool, your favourite coffee is in the lunch room, or the have pot-luck lunches. 5 star reviews are for when a service is win-win and reasonable expectations are fulfilled. If the employer doesn't provide extra training, career development, keeps increasing the performance requirements, and/or asks for sick notes, then they are just an average employer