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When Someone Insults You, Say This Instead

Manners Matters

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#mannersmatters #stayclassy #elegance
Ever been hit with a compliment that wasn’t a compliment? This video breaks down how to handle rude people—calmly, cleverly, and without letting it slide.
Learn the art of quiet comebacks, subtle power moves, and setting boundaries with elegance.
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20 Comments

@MannersMattersChannel Creator 1 year ago Pinned

What’s the rudest comment you’ve ever received—and how did you respond❓ I’m genuinely curious.

@teenindustry 1 year ago

If someone says something truly offensive I just say what an odd thing to say

@shellygreenan2407 1 year ago

Its all so exhausting...I will keep the company of my dogs lol

@sandihill669 6 months ago

Im overweight. A child asked me if I if was pregnant, her father spluttered laughing, I gave him a look bent down to the child and said, no it’s all me, just like your Daddy’s tummy.

@Katiemae84 6 months ago (edited)

“Oh? Why do you ask?” Very calmly and politely,it works wonders.

@denisecaringer4726 6 months ago

I had one rude employee who had moved from another state to take the job in my department. Almost immediately, she started complaining about everything and then it escalated into comments about me -- sometimes directly but most of the time behind my back but just loud enough for me to hear. She did good work, and that was my focus. She obviously was insecure. I treated her well, supported her work and progress and was professional. Clearly, she was insecure, but I couldn't solve that. Her nasty comments continued. Here's the sort of "woo woo" part of the story. I took early retirement some time after she had moved on to another department, and I lost track of her. In a dream one night, she came to me sincerely sweet and thanking me. I learned the next day that she had died of cancer. I really did try to be kind and professional with her. Sometimes, it's best to do the right thing and keep your own little hurts to yourself.

@Kate-lk6tw 6 months ago

“I’m surprised you’re comfortable saying that aloud.”

@apieper3863 1 year ago

My ex made fun of my new husband by saying that he was quite nice, but that he would look better with more hair. I smiled at him and said, "Maybe. But he has beautiful teeth. " Knowing that my ex's teeth are his biggest weakness.

@sar8349 6 months ago

They're called backhanded compliments and they are insults.

@JanetMosby-v5u 6 months ago

I worked in a small coffee shop as a waitress in my teen years. We had several customers that never tipped. They would be rude, so you would respond rudely back, then they were justified in not tipping you. Sometimes if they sat in another waitress’ station, they would be ignored. I would step in. One was a young lady who eventually asked, “How come no matter where I sit, I get you as my waitress?” I responded, after a pause, “I guess we’re both just lucky.” I got a tip from her that day.

@jaimicottrill2831 1 year ago

I like the point about not matching their tone- so true that we shouldn't descend to their level! While I seem to be surrounded by lovely people who don't do passive aggressive, there have been times when I have been confronted with rudeness. One time, a man was hitting on me and I turned him down. He declared that I "must be a lesbian" and I paused, and replied "if that makes it easier for you". He was so confused and didn't know what to say after that!

@suzieq4vols593 6 months ago

I came to a luncheon dressed nicer than I usually dress. My sis in law looked at me and stated that I'd gained weight since I'd gotten married. I've been married for 30 years. Honestly it surprised me so much I just looked at her. That's when I learned that silence is more powerful than anything else. Her cousin blew up and called her rude and stated that she herself had gained weight since she had gotten married 35 years ago! lol!

@jeanholtz579 8 months ago

Rude comments : I do not respond. Silence is all they get from me.

@robertataylor4301 6 months ago

I was at a popular family restaurant and in the restroom a young woman and her daughter came in. We are standing at the sinks when an older woman came in and immediately commented on the Mom’s hair, saying “That’s an interesting hairstyle for a grown woman.”
The Mom said, “Thank you so much!”
I almost laughed aloud!
She spared her daughter a scene and I loved it!

@maybee... 6 months ago

Someone once said to me "wow, you've really come up in the world"... I said "hmm, never knew I was down"...

@ElizabethPetrie-m3z 8 months ago

When someone makes a rude comment or asks an intrusive question, I ask, “Why do you say that/ask?” Whatever they say as an answer, I just say, “Oh.” The silence is golden.

@jennifer3551 6 months ago

Whenever I receive the predictable and unimaginative, "It must be nice" comment, I answer back with my signature smirk and, "Yes, yes it is" reply. This pretty much shuts them down 😉😏😏😏

@CathyWithACee 6 months ago

Great advice! My story:
A neighbor once approached me in his car as I was walking on the sidewalk about something going on in the neighborhood I was a part of and he didn’t agree with. He was shaking with anger and clenching bbq his fists as he shouted at me. I stared silently at him for a beat, looking directly at him and said, “Are you OK?” He was at a loss for words—very unlike him—as I calmly walked away.

@johnhough7738 1 year ago

As a rreply to the comment "It must be nice to have all that free time!"
Try three words, innocently delivered ... "It certainly is."

@kellyross4801 6 months ago

My answer to many things - deliberate rudeness, an inappropriately personal question, or an unsolicited criticism, is to take a beat, stare at them, and ask *quietly, "Why would you say such a thing?" I let it hang, then change the subject or turn away.