Neuropsychiatrist and relationship expert Boris Cyrulnik reveals how our brain has already chosen who we will love, why love at first sight is like a shot of cocaine, and the evolutionary story behind love, marriage, and personal happiness!

Episode available on all podcast platforms: https://linktr.ee/Antidoxe

What you'll learn:
Why we have less sex today
How dopamine and oxytocin influence the type of love we experience
Why marriage is a male invention, and marriage based on love a female invention
The evolutionary importance of infidelity, but the cultural importance of fidelity
Why we all have a soulmate

Dr. Cyrulnik is the author of 'When You Fall in Love, You Get Up Attached' (2025): https://fliz.ly/LZply_y

Chapters:
0:00 Introduction
1:37 Young People Have Less Sex
3:24 Marriage Was Long Useless
3:58 The Rise of Patriarchy
4:40 The Social Functions of Marriage
6:06 Neuroimaging of the Brain in Love: It's on the Rise
8:46 The Brain Attached, love woven over time
9:52 Love imprisons, while attachment liberates
11:24 Romantic encounters: a coincidence? Not a chance
14:28 Meeting places
17:24 Mothers' love at first sight after the birth of their baby
19:08 The benefits of being in a couple vs. being single
19:28 The pursuit of individual happiness is a new idea
21:09 The rejection of motherhood explodes
22:52 How to be happy with family responsibilities
23:30 The benefits of personal development
24:13 The origins of the reproduction of social inequalities, from early childhood
25:45 Is there love among animals?

26:52 Human beings need social interaction and connection with others
28:26 The importance of love for human evolution
29:15 Humans are an unfaithful species
31:20 The impact of childhood on your way of loving
33:51 The impact of maternal suffering on the baby
36:12 Compatibility of attachment styles in couples
39:17 The fear of falling in love
40:55 The sacred and warlike functions of marriage
42:42 Arranged marriage, happy marriage!

44:04 Progress is a vulnerability factor
45:49 The reassuring attraction of authoritarian powers
48:35 The rise in anxiety, and boys' disengagement
50:49 Why civilizations collapse
54:32 The sources of current populism
55:33 Gender parity has never existed, male violence
59:25 Bonus: why surveys say men have more sexual activity than women

Sources for Notes:
Early sexuality
Ifop-LELO study, 2024, citing the 1972 Simon report: https://www.ifop.com/wp-content/uploa...
Women's refusal of motherhood
INED Note 1: https://www.ined.fr/fichier/s_rubriqu...
INED Note 2: https://www.ined.fr/fr/publications/e...
Schaeper et al. 2017: https://link.springer.com/chapter/10....
Attachment Styles
Ainsworth et al. 1978, van IJzendoorn & Kroonenberg 1988: https://www.jstor.org/stable/1130396
Infant Mortality
INED Note: https://www.ined.fr/fr/tout-savoir-po...
Surviving Species
Raup and Sepkosi 1982: https://www.science.org/doi/abs/10.11...
Taylor 2009: https://www.cambridge.org/core/books/...
Palms at Greenland
Silver, Reyes et al. 2025: https://academic.oup.com/aob/advance-...
Eldrett et al. 2009: https://www.nature.com/articles/natur...
Sexuality (end)
CSF Report 2023: https://anrs.fr/wp-content/uploads/20...
INED Note, 1992: https://www.ined.fr/fichier/s_rubriqu...

Find Antidoxe on:

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/7lStMKN...
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For any inquiries: contact@lydda.fr

#love #marriage #loveatfirstsight #cyrulnik #podcast