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Caller: “Why Is My Wife Unhappy?”

The Dr. John Delony Show

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On today’s episode, we hear about:
A man striving to help his wife rediscover herself
A woman wondering if she should tell her kids about their dad’s affair
A man who misses the in-laws he lost after his divorce

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Episode Chapters
00:00:00 Intro
00:02:20 My Wife Has Lost Herself
00:21:06 My Husband’s Affair Saved Our Marriage
00:43:40 I Miss My Ex . . . In-Laws

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20 Comments

@TheDrJohnDelonyShow Creator 7 days ago Pinned

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@elsycruz5353 8 hours ago

I didn't need permission from my husband to talk to anyone about his affair when it happened. If you don't want people to think bad about you don't do this kind of things

@user-qp2qe5gf9b 13 hours ago

Some secrets are meant to be kept. I’d be pissed if my parents told me about a past affair. My mom told me a few heavy secrets as an adult and I think it made her feel better, but it has become my burden to carry.

@Choose_Happy64 12 hours ago

I was a stay at home mom for 20 yrs. Everyone around me made my needs atrophy. Even after I started working, all of my “chores & responsibilities” were the same. They just had to be fitted in around working 14 hr days in real estate. I just had added expenses to be responsible for when I began working. After 40 yrs, menopause and losing some of my filter, it is much better.

@Partyof4plus2 14 hours ago (edited)

First call, and granted I haven’t listened to the whole thing yet, but they both assumed that because the youngest is 10 now, she has more time on her hands. As a stay-at-home mom….thats both true and not true. 😂 It may not be as “hands on” like putting kids down for naps, feeding them, changing diapers, etc….but it becomes more mental. Keeping up with schedules, school functions, curricular activities, keeping them busy with friends and a social life, not to mention all the teenage hormones and drama that comes within those years, etc. …So less “physically demanding” but now it’s become more “mentally demanding”. I’m actually in this spot where I feel like I want to do something for me and figure out who I am but my kids as teenagers (who can’t drive yet) still need me. And I LOVE BEING “MOM”!!!! But it’s hard to find the balance.

@b7Hn4eX8yv4m 13 hours ago

I'm so glad that my marriage isn't such a train wreck that getting cheated on is what fixes it... May God help humanity, ya'll are lost.

@harrietbaker4484 7 hours ago

Can’t anything be kept just between adults any longer? Isn’t there a statement that says kids do not need to be privy to marital details?

@markmadethings9453 13 hours ago

CALLER ONE WAS AMAZING. I’ve been married 24 years as well, we have a 14 and 19 year old, and my wife has been full time employed the duration of our parenting years. But she’s in the field of caring for others, and has had to deal with ailing parents with little sibling support, and she definitely has lost a little sense of self and for some reason talking about it with me is overwhelming to her - so we just skip it. But like caller one, I adore this woman and I want her to realize her full self and potential, in the ways she has supported ME to do the same. I wish she could afford herself that opportunity, to know HOW WORTH IT SHE IS. Loved the conversation between John and Steve. So unbelievably relatable to the husband of an amazing wife who we just want to see thrive, and they struggle to see where they align outside of the job and the nurturing of others.

@KrisG66 12 hours ago

Why oh why would you tell your kids?!?!?

@islamiclifestyle8891 9 hours ago

For anyone who constantly feels overwhelmed, tense or mentally exhausted, Anwen Reid’s anxiety quiz could be a useful place to start. It only takes a few minutes.

@shannonstrait6787 11 hours ago

This is so true. After raising kids for so long I have no clue what I want or what I need. When my husband ask I literally can’t tell him one thing that gives me joy because I have never had the time to think about it.

@williamr4053 11 hours ago

For the third caller, what’s so hard and I believe is his biggest struggle, is he can plug these holes in his life, but he still feels empty. Truth is, he misses what he had with his wife and in-laws. Reconciliation is over, as she’s married to someone else. He’s maybe dated some since the divorce and nothing worked out.

The hardest part is moving forward with your life when you feel everyone around is living the life you used to have. Single is better than being cheated on by far, but it can be a challenge to fill those voids as a one of one.

@tinarollings8719 10 hours ago

If there was an affair and the woman got pregnant with another mans baby and they want to tell the children that the sibling has a different dad. But this is an affair that has nothing to do with the children. If they grow up and ask about affairs or need to learn thru it thats one thing. To even think of telling elementary children does not make sense at all to me.

@shannalee80 14 hours ago

Second call - I think that if the children don't ask, don't tell them until they're at least adults. There's a chance that the children have a feeling that something has been going on about their father. They can discuss their father's mental health struggles. I don't think that they should bring up about the affair unless they specifically ask about that.

@kathirodden6109 11 hours ago (edited)

Thomas, I want to hug you. The world is not fair and I will give you an example; I was raised in a dysfunctional toxic environment and I’m now 65 and have been in therapy for years- I am a successful woman but it doesn’t change the fact that I had no self esteem growing up therefore I missed out on so many opportunities and great things. I do have self esteem now but in therapy she said, “life is not fair Kathi but starting today you can live your best life ,” we cannot change the past or why those terrible things happened to you. See what I am saying. Today is the first day of your best life! For Xmas do something different with your kids than before. Don’t just sit at home! When you remarry you can have that new family again with a new family - keep going!! ❤. I need to call Dr Delony myself- you need to find someone to talk to a friend or a therapist- if the fit isn’t good go to a different one. Ok 👌

@MellWitt 11 hours ago

All through the portals rant, all I can think is "the cake is a lie" 🤣

@SashaBrown-h5h 14 hours ago

My late husband has been gone three plus years and I still am trying to figure out who I am now. I’m in a doctoral program but there’s more to life than being a student. We were married ten years and I lost myself and I’m still trying to find me somewhere

@May.Mae_ 13 hours ago

I was born in 87 and I still raise my kids that way. Grant it we live in the North East so it's a much easier...we're still sort of disconnected up here. It's wonderful when your 12yr old ask for a new bike instead of a phone 👌🏽🙌🏽