These people appear to be so normal when we meet them but they are really not well mentally.

You know that you are not the narcissist when you are able to watch these videos and deeply try to understand what’s happening. They will never listen to videos like this and if they do, it is to insult you. They hate the truth about themselves.

The first sign the flip has begun is the stare. You’ve done absolutely nothing and yet you wake up and they have a different look on their face you’ve never seen. Almost a disdain. That’s the first sign.

They live in such a world of delusion and fantasy. It seems to me that they are never in touch with reality.

Exactly the way you describe, my husband of 32 years knew he has to leave his fantasy life (with his side trash in another city), and come back “home” as he called it, when his cancer got bad so I could  take care of him during what turned out to be his last 4 months. I took great care of him even though he tried to destroy me on his way out, he lost. It’s now 10 months since he died, and I’m still dealing with the emotional mess of it all, however, peace and healing are slowly replacing chaos and torture now, it’s a good start

I've not been able to grasp why one of the last things he said to me was that he can't trust me anymore, and genuinely meant it, when he was the cheater. Now it all makes so much sense. Absolute lightbulb moment. Thank you.

Narcissistic persons were like living tragedy. Wherever they perform ,  people cries

That poor young woman he has now is in for a rough ride. I will never understand why "friends" just sit back and allow him to treat women so badly when they know his history. People need to stop supporting these cowards.

The whole idea of narcissists making people into avatars of either all good or all bad explains why they cannot interact with people interpersonally as they are, as imperfect/ perfect humans. Thank You Dr. Vaknin, for your very informative videos.

This is so spot on. My husband of 17 years told me I’m just like his mother (who was strung out on drugs when he was little, would leave him and his brother for days at a time to get her fix).  🤨 I am nothing like his mother. I am a great mother to our kids and he envies that so much!

Also, during the discard phase, I asked for a divorce and he went into hiding mode inside the house. I couldn’t even talk to him about a possible amicable divorce. I finally had to apologize for all my wrongdoings and his response was he has prayed for this change in me lol. He told me the only reason why we were able to talk was because my approach was calm and I didn’t have an ego. It’s always me, me, me… always my fault!
I’m so over it!

After a while,  you start to notice a huge difference in their personality from when you first met them.  The more comfortable they get, they will say things to let you know exactly who they are and what they are doing.   When you are blamed for something or things that you didn't do, they are doing those things or feeling that way.   Watch the actions and listen.

The narcissist's mind is a haunted house! Love this Dr. Sam. Hall of mirrors 😢 Wow

My ex husband was obsessed with wanting me to have sex with others. I couldn’t understand it. First real explanation I’ve heard. Later, he constantly accused me of cheating. Which I wasn’t. But he was finally able to discard me for good over it. Which apparently was the point of the whole thing. Sick.

I will never forget the moment when I hugged my ex narcissistic boyfriend, him sitting down, me standing up so his head was resting on my chest and then he said "MOMMY"... Cold chill went down my spine and I could tell something was wrong. After he discarded me I came across this lecture and I couldn't believe it, he really saw me as a mother, so amazing, everything said is spot on

This one was hitting the bases! I was faster than the coward. Got everything. Cheating consists of cheating myself. I held my head high before, during, and after. Yes, he is an ex now. Enjoying peace. Yay...

I must say I'm okay with the narc getting stuck with my bad introject in his mind. It serves him right for trying to mess with my healthy brain... 👍👺🤡💩

I’ve looked and got lost in that hall of mirrors, the narc gaze. It was an eye lock I could not escape. My life changed after that moment.

The crazy thing is that that Covert Narcissist was telling me who he is from the beginning: 😂 Things like nobody ever told me about the fungus on my toes, you drive nice those others drive crazy, you smell good, those others stink, you’re different you speak well, those other speak e-bonics. I never bothered to ask about who exactly! He was letting me know that he had a Matrix of women. In retrospect , I was so intrigued with his compliments I was caught in the trap of illusion of how wonderful he sees me. It was very real. Until the confusing Ghosting: The mental Discard. That’s when I woke up. I chased him for a week. He gave a lame excuse., decided to to go No Contact the Reverse Discard and he chased me. I was now educated and he was coming for Revenge. Never got the chance. I’m remaining No Contact.
He stuck in my mind and everyday is less. What an experience! I’m aware and awake now!

Wow, even just at 7:14 I am totally shaken up. I remember our first year of marriage having so many arguments and fights and frequently I would tell him I don’t think you really love me. I think you love the idea of me. turns out I was right. Literally.

that is such a trip.

I watch your videos till the end every day ,i put my ear pods and listen to you when i relax in my bed or when i'm cooking , sometimes I listen to one video sometimes two to three , a lot of them I rewatch again and again to have a better grasp.