In short: …be nonchalant…in a good way…don't ask too many questions… don’t nag…don't worry too much…where are you…who are you with…what were you doing…you're not his mother…don't chase after him…find something to care about…your health, yourself, your body…hang out with your friends…shop…and dont you ever change for anyone..change for yourself..live your life gurl

When a man pulls away let him ❤

1. Calm yourself down, don't depend on him for it
2. Stop chasing
3. Keep your plans, have a life of your own
4. Clearly communicate what you're feeling without writing paragraphs.
5. His behaviour doesn't determine your self worth.
6. Give them space, don't over text. Let space be space.
7. Stop running away from your own company, don't be afraid to sit down with yourself.
8. Don't adjust your personality, adjust your access. Be happy, just less available.
9. Recognise bare minimum effort and if it is really correct for you.
10. Don't be worried about honest conversations and if it ends in the relationship ending.
11. Be willing to walk away. Know your value. Treat yourself how you want to be treated.


Edit: I broke up with him in March 2026, I'm much happier now and glad that I don't need to make notes to handle his behaviour anymore.

Let a ghost be a ghost. Disappear as well. No hate, no hard feelings, nothing. A secure person lets life unfold while working on yourself, your goals, your philanthropy, lending your gifts to the world

Im secure but i wont accept someone being in consistent with communication and going absent for days at a time with no word

A guy ghosted me, disappeared for months, and then eventually came back wanting to reconnect. I remember thinking… the nerve. Who does he think I am, someone with no self-respect? I ignored him. If he was fine going months without speaking to me, then he would be just fine never hearing from me again.

Dump him. The right guy doesn’t  pull away

As a secure woman myself yes we don’t waste our time with men who pull away. We just set the boundary and keep it moving. ❤

When a guy doesn't naturally escalate the relationship, I just block or ghost. It isn't worth waiting for someone who isn't actually trying to date you. There are others out there.

My advice is gonna sound harsh. Don’t date an avoidant, someone with a very very busy life, or someone who needs a lot of space and time alone. They’re the ones more likely to pull away

I watched Bridget JOnes's Diary last night and i noticed something.  Whilst Bridget is a clumsy mess, the moment that Daniel hurt her she was done and gone. Didn't chase him or beg. In fact, she politely told him off, she quit the job he was at and got a new career.  She was a boss for that!

I don’t mind giving him space, but not dictated by his mood swings… I’m not going to be ignored for a weekend and call that “me time”

I’m somewhere between being anxious and secure but one thing I will never do is chase a man (regardless of who they are)‼️

cutting a cake tonight ladies! after watching self help videos for months i ended an unhealthy relationship of two years ysterday. feels surreal.


EDIT: Thank you everyone❤️❤️

Silence can be a strategy, but clarity is a solution. Silence without asking is dangerous.

I'm 56 and men dont change, still act exactly the same at 50.    Brilliant advice, its also so true  Just their wiring  is just so different, but this chat is so so true in all aspects.

timing could not be better, this is exactly what im going through . He left for the holidays and is now giving signs of pulling away. I was literally crying about it and then your video popped up . God works in mysterious ways, love you Margarita

Calling them  astronauts is really tickling me😂

Started watching last year after breaking up with an avoidant man. More than a year later I met another one I handled this situation so well😊. I didn't cry and ask why when he cancelled last minute when I was dressed and ready to go y'all 😅. I just went out with my friends instead. I told him how I felt about what he did and removed access just simple polite messages no more nice happy girl messages. When I pulled back I realised he wasn't really what I wanted and walked away 😊

can we have a whole video on adjusting our access with more examples