In this video, several women share painful experiences of dating or being involved with men who presented themselves as Christians. Some described manipulation, controlling behavior, emotional abuse, and situations where scriptures were used to justify or excuse unhealthy behavior.

And this raises an important question:

Are we sometimes mistaking someone’s religious identity for their character?

Going to church is not a substitute for kindness, integrity, emotional maturity, accountability, respect, or good character.

A person can attend church regularly and still have serious character issues. At the same time, we should also remember that nobody is perfect simply because they attend church—or because they don’t.

Think of church like a hospital: people go there because they are still growing, learning, healing, and working on themselves.

So when you’re considering someone for a relationship or marriage, don’t only look at where they worship. Look at how they treat people.

How does he treat women?
How does he treat his family?
How does he respond when he’s angry?
Does he respect boundaries?
Can he admit when he’s wrong?
Does he manipulate people with religion?
Does his behavior match what he says he believes?

Because character is revealed not only in the church pews, but also in everyday life.

Watch the full video and tell me what you think.

Can someone be a committed churchgoer and still be a terrible partner?

Share your thoughts respectfully in the comments.

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