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"I have no friends"- it's a trend and worse than you think

Akta

1,163,857 views

"I have no friends"- it's a trend and worse than you think

I recently made the video "18 years old- I have no friends". I'd love to say it was an original video idea, but truthfully, I've watched a lot of videos like it. Whilst every story is different, one thing is strikingly similar- the video's popularity. Videos about having no friends do pretty well on YouTube, some have gone viral and garnered millions of views even for a small YouTube channel. The YouTube algorithm makes it look like a trend. In reality, it's a loneliness epidemic.

Whilst I'm grateful that people related to my story and that I'm not alone in feeling like I struggle to make friends, it's pretty sad that this is where we are. In today's video I wanted to explore why so many of us feel this way, and what we can do to make things better.

Chapters
00:00 Is it a trend?
02:26 why having no friends is common
06:57 how do we overcome feeling alone or having no friends

🎥 More videos you may enjoy:
18 years old: I have no friends [18 years old: I have no friends](18 years old: I have no friends)
If you want to be less lonely [Our perspective of friendships is wrong](Our perspective of friendships is wrong)
Finding myself in my 20s (it's not what you think) [You don’t need to find yourself, you just ...](You don’t need to find yourself, you just ...)

Music from Epidemic Sound https://www.epidemicsound.com/referra...

About Me 👩🏽
I'm Akta, an overthinker trying to be more mindful by slowing down, finding a better balance with productivity and finding the magic in everyday. I'm a dentist who works part time and I'm also doing yoga teacher training & exploring my more creative side through art and YouTube.

Disclaimer:
All clips used in this video are used for educational purposes and to help illustrate points, and fall within the guidelines of fair use. No copyright infringement is intended. If you are or represent the copyright owner of materials used in this video and have a problem with the use of said material, please contact me via my email.

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I have no friends, 18 years old, 30 years old, feeling alone, loneliness, YouTube trend, algorithm

20 Comments

@1Gr8Editrix 4 years ago

It's not friends you need; rather, a community. People with shared interests, goals, values, and culture.

@jabrilbryant5806 4 years ago

"There is an old saying: "No man is your enemy, no man is your friend, every man is your teacher." - Florence Scovel

@antonias7637 4 years ago

No friends is a silent pandemic that nobody is talking about. Thanks for your bravery in talking about it.

@melaniebenoist9432 2 years ago

I realized social media and the internet sort of alienated people. I noticed my mom randomly calls up people and says she was thinking about them, and then they start talking I think we lost this ability. I remember as a kid in the late 90s 2000s I would just go to my friends house or call them if I was bored or lonely. People are more weary of random calls and visits now

@bluBlaq33 3 years ago

Honestly it hurts when I see people who are awful and cruel have many friends.

@kenndadon4226 3 years ago

Loneliness is not a trend. It’s real and it hurts

@coolbreeze5683 4 years ago (edited)

Growing up in the 80s and 90s, you had time to watch your favourite shows on TV but at the same time, most were constantly out in the neighborhood looking for things to do. You'd meet people at school and you didn't have to be constantly in conversation with someone to consider them a friend. You just hang out, be bored together and share experiences. Seeing teens converse now, as soon as there's a silence, people get awkward and need to pick up their phones instead of just interacting with their surroundings.

@rose84-k9n 3 years ago

It's not even about having no friends, it's the number of fall outs due to small disagreements or betrayal that keeps happening over and over again.

@DeniceGarrou 4 years ago

I'm 61 with no friends. At my age I get tired of people being interested in me only to buy what they are selling...It doesn't get any easier kids.

@kyledrewes6552 4 years ago

Having no friends is better than having fake ones.

@miki_c-f1l 3 years ago

For me loneliness is not a trend and it feels absolutely horrible. I had many friends who used me and threw me away. I can’t trust anyone anymore and I’m scared to leave the house. No one deserves that kind of feeling

@esraevren9497 3 years ago

Everybody is busy when you ask them hang out. They’re busy on social media. I consider that in this generation people don’t know what the friendship is.

@pettyten1582 4 years ago

what I find funny but kind of comforting is that people in the comments are expressing exactly how I feel. being used like a free therapist, getting too close, regretting introducing yourself, struggling with introverted personality. all this proves is that we haven't met the good people yet, people like us aren't the problem, I wish all of you (and myself) the best. plus at the end of the day, you should be best friends with yourself first.

@mariammekhaeil8233 3 years ago

My problem is that when I try to make friends, I instantly feel like the other person doesn't want to be friends with me

@iknowexactlywhoyouare8701 3 years ago

“I used to think the worst thing in life is to end up all alone. But it isn’t. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone.”

-Robin Williams

@BMichael08 2 years ago

Society is becoming more and more isolated due to social media addiction and the inability to connect emotionally with others. This "no friend" trend/epidemic doesn't surprise me.

@olamideolayinka4130 4 years ago

The problem is my friendships are always so one-sided. All the efforts of keeping that relationship is coming from me. It’s tiring and disappointing that they don’t value you or the friendship as much as you do. My advice would concentrate on your family, be closer to your parents, brothers and sisters.

@LoneLionLeo 4 years ago (edited)

My problem with making friends is that I make friends and start thinking I’m closer to them than we actually are because I myself dont have close friends. I naturally latch to any friend but once I realize they actually have friends who they consider closer, I get embarrassed and slowly push them away because I don’t matter to them the way they matter to me. And it sucks feeling one sided and being the one that is always inviting or initiating going out. So when I go distant, I realize I never truly mattered to them. I’ve realized I sabotage myself by doing that or acting moody towards them on purpose as a mechanism to protect myself from potential getting hurt by them if they ghost me once I started to see them as a friend. Making friends at work is hard because people quit and forget about you. Nothing deeper ties you together. Some coworkers you might consider friends probably don’t see you as one even if you’ve hung out outside of work. They probably have coworkers they like better than you. It’s really exhausting. At this point I’ve met better friends online than in person.

@zackhyde 3 years ago (edited)

As someone who has no friends it genuinely makes me angry how in the dark people are about how hard it is to socialise and make friends.

@whynot1548 2 years ago

It always makes me angry and resentful when I see people who can generate friendships and relationships with ease.....but are flippant, lazy, disloyal, and spoiled in that regard.

While alot of us struggle with getting any of those things.