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When you've lost the will to do what you need to do

Dr. Scott Eilers

902,919 views

If my videos have helped, my new book, The Light Between the Leaves, goes even deeper
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Life is getting harder, and it can feel absolutely exhausting to do even the most basic of activities.

This is due to the finite nature of willpower and our constant battle against high-stimulation activities, especially smartphones. To regain control you have to take charge of your inner ecosystem.

Let's talk about that.

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About me:
I know what it is to feel hopelessly stuck and worthless to the world in general. I also know what it is to live without those feelings. I’m both a Clinical Psychology specializing in treatment-resistant depression and anxiety, and a human who has spent more than a decade managing sever depression and anxiety.

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Disclaimer: This content is not intended to be a replacement for receiving treatment. It is purely educational in nature. My relationship with you is that of presenter and audience, not therapist and client.

But I do care.

What you'll find in this video

00:00 The Feeling of Losing Time and Control
Life can often feel overwhelming, making you feel like you're losing time and control over your own life. This sensation is due to various factors, and there's a way to regain some control over your daily experiences.

03:31 The Role of Willpower in Decision-Making
Willpower is a finite resource used to make choices among available activities. When your willpower is depleted, you tend to resort to activities that require minimal effort and provide instant gratification. Understanding the role of willpower is crucial for managing your daily choices effectively.

07:02 The Impact of Smartphones on Willpower
Smartphones offer constant access to highly stimulating activities, making it challenging to resist their allure. The pervasive availability of these devices can drain your willpower and leave you feeling exhausted by the end of the day.

10:38 Setting Limits on Smartphone Usage
To regain control over your life and make daily activities more enjoyable, consider setting limits on smartphone usage. You can either remove troublesome apps or establish specific timeframes for phone use, allowing other aspects of your life to become more engaging.

14:29 Taking Charge of Your Inner Ecosystem
While external factors are beyond your control, you can take charge of your inner ecosystem. By managing your smartphone usage and making deliberate choices, you can create a more fulfilling daily experience and reduce the feeling of constant exhaustion.

20 Comments

@heatherpoulin2994 2 years ago

All I want to do is sleep. It’s a release from the pain. And when I, awake I’m soooooo exhausted can barely function

@EmilyKnowlton-i4e 2 years ago

When the future holds no promise. There isn't the motivation to keep going.yet we are programmed to live. It's very expensive to just exist.

@Scottrobot11 2 years ago

Doing anything at all, theses days, takes an enormous amount of willpower that I just don’t have anymore.

@Pac157 2 years ago

I'm not worn out from one day, I'm worn out from YEARS of battle and I just avoid, avoid and avoid again.

@Rsony77 2 years ago

I feel like a stranger in a strange land, and it keeps getting harder and harder to juggle the balls....

@HappyCat1111 2 years ago

I’m almost 50. Had cancer, survived it, then my pets died, I went thru divorce, and was basically forced to quit my job in the span of 3 years. I’m living off a small savings and working up the courage to find work. I honestly feel ready to throw in the towel. I don’t want to live, but not ready to die either. I honestly don’t know how to move forward.

@humanpersonne 2 years ago

As a broke person dealing with depression on my own for the past 7 years, you have no idea how much i appreciate your videos. Hugs.❤ and thank you so so much.

@MontaeIsHungry 2 years ago (edited)

It feels especially hard when you have had depression since childhood because you just don't remember a normal, fulfilling life without depression. So there's no reference to go off of. At that point, depression is your life and you just have to find ways to lessen the effects it has on your day to day.

@chronotize03 2 years ago

I just want to get a group of depressed people like me and just cry together. We deserve people who feel the same pain

@joynichols4002 2 years ago

What do you do when you no longer want to live but you have people you can’t leave behind on their own?

@Lantern72 2 years ago (edited)

All day, every day. 52yrs old, back n body is physically shot, depression, anxiety, ADHD, burried in debt, broke as a joke, can't find a job, will never see retirement, house is falling apart around me, little to no family, or friends. Just feeling defeated in life.

@michaelpaul721 2 years ago

There were so many times when the smallest kindness kept me going.

@PaigeBartholomew 2 years ago

I’m a therapist in Texas and I have to tell you that I’m so proud of you for making videos that talk about the real shit that people go through. You’re really strong and courageous to share your own personal journey with your clients and viewers. I hope that more and more therapists start becoming honest about their own personal human struggles… Because it takes all of the power dynamic away between client and therapist. Such a relief. Thank you so much!

@alicec.6195 2 years ago

You break free from your smartphone/apps/social media just to realize you are alone, everybody around you is on it and being ignored is the new normal.

@DanealLamb-s5x 2 months ago

My pets are what's keeping me going. They still bring me joy and love.

@lisawanderess 2 years ago

People like me who "slip through the cracks" because we outwardly appear to be coping, but privately struggle just to keep going... for me every day is a challenge as I'm technically (and invisibly) homeless and also technically (and invisibly) disabled, but I really try to keep seeking beauty in life's experiences as often as possible to give me reasons to keep living....

@gloriadonahue7241 2 years ago (edited)

What I have a problem with is to STOP doing things and just have fun. I can't remember the last time I've had fun.

@julieschoolcraft1503 2 years ago

I’m so burned out today that I can barely stand it. I’m exhausted from depression and anxiety. I’ve been told that you can’t have both at the same time but I’m here to say that you can !

@onerider808 2 years ago

I had to limit watching the news; the endless array of terrible problems beyond my control was literally making me sick. Quitting TV, internet, video games, and allowing only YouTube for social media sure was helpful. Staying physically and mentally active sure helps, too, along with a good diet.